“Oh my God,” I finally said, laughing at myself about the whole thing and glad it was over. “Good morning, baby. Sorry about that…I stuffed hot food into my mouth and—”
I heard a lot of shuffling and looked at my phone, confused.
Then a woman laughed.
What the fuck?
“Okay, okay. Do it again. I’ll be Nourah.” She said.
I frowned but before I could fully process what she’d said, Carl’s voice came through faintly.
Then the woman spoke again. “I love you too.”
I froze. There was no way in hell I was hearing what I thought I was hearing from Carl’s phone.
It had to be a prank. Or maybe he’d let somebody borrow his phone.
My hand flew to the speaker that was playing music, and I turned that shit all the way down so fast I damn near broke it with how hard I was pressing the buttons.
I stayed quiet, listening.
My heart started doing something funny. I felt that shit in my ears, ass, and belly button.
I placed both hands flat on the counter to brace myself.
“Hello?!”
Then Carl’s voice came through clearer. “So… you’ll marry me?”
The woman laughed again. “Oh my God, yes! Yes, Carl!”
“Huh?” My eyes grew so wide I knew I looked crazy. Deranged as hell, actually. “HELLO? Nigga, what the fuck are you doing?”
I quickly hung up.
“Nope.” I was already hitting his name to call back, pacing from my stove to my sink and back.
It rang. And rang. And rang.
“Pick up the damn phone!” I said through clenched teeth.
Instead, I got that stupid-ass voicemail.
“Heyyy, you’ve reached Carl, the tech guy. I’m probably fixing somebody’s WiFi right now but leave me a message and I’ll get back to you fasterrr than dial-up.”
Beep!
“You need to call me back right now!”
I hung up and set the phone down on the counter, putting my hand on my hip, and just stood there in disbelief.
That’s when the smoke detector went off.
“Oh, shit!”
I spun around, and my eggs were burnt as hell. I cut the eye off, grabbed the handle with the bottom of my T-shirt and ran that pan over to the sink, twisted the faucet all the way on and shoved it under.
Steam came straight up into my face as I waved my free hand around while the smoke detector kept going.