Page 22 of Antonio Miles

I knew I had to come to terms with the fact I couldn’t keep Tessa at arm’s length when she kept closing the gap between us herself. As I stood there, the shut door to her bedroom between us, I understood I had no strategy for a woman who simply refused to be managed. And that not having a plan should have terrified me a great deal more than it did.

Chapter Seven

Tessa

The weight woke me first. Something solid and warm across my waist, a body pressed against my back. My pulse spiked hard, my hands went flat against the mattress, and I was two seconds from rolling off the edge before my brain caught up with my nose.

Cedar. Gunpowder. A trace of expensive soap. Antonio.

I lay still and made myself breathe. I had to smile. I’d left my door unlocked just to see if he’d take the invitation I offered. I knew I could keep him out. He’d made a point that I had control over who entered my suite. Even him.

His breathing came slow and even against the back of my neck. Fully clothed. On top of the covers. How was this guy even real? His arm lay heavy across my waist, his body heat soaking through the blanket between us.

I think part of me had convinced myself Antonio wouldn’t come after me. I still wasn’t sure what to make of his last statement. How could he possibly be afraid of me? But he had come. He’d stayed with me even though I’d told him not to. I recognized Antonio had control issues, but I also knew his need for control stemmed from the need to keep his family safe.

Emotion formed a tight band around my chest and I hated it. If I let myself fall for this man, I’d be so in over my head I’d never find my way up. Actually, I might already be in over my head. I was more than half in love with the man, and I wasn’t really even sure I liked him. Try as I might, though, I couldn’t make myself push him away. Most of all, I hated that it mattered so much to me that he’d come back to me. Tonio had waited until I fell asleep, so I wouldn’t try to put on a brave face and deny I wanted him with me when I was completely terrified for him to leave. I wanted him to see me as a strong woman, one worthy of a man like him. Not as the weak link in his family. A liability.

I stared at the window where the silvery early morning sun tried to burn through the fog from the river. Behind me, Tonio shifted. His arm tightened before he stilled again, and his breathing stayed even. I turned my head, so I could look back at him over my shoulder until I could see his face in the darkened room.

The tension he carried when he was awake seemed to have melted away in his sleep. I had a moment to wonder if he’d intended to stay with me all night or if he’d thought to leave before I woke.

“I can hear you thinking,” Tonio rumbled softly next to my ear. I felt him press his lips to the skin behind my ear and move down my neck. I was in so much trouble here. I didn’t mind admitting Antonio was way the fuck out of my league, but I also didn’t have enough willpower to resist him. “Sleep. We both need it.”

“You’re the one who’s awake,” I said. My voice came out rough, sleep clinging around the edges, but I still smiled. “And you’re the one kissing my neck.”

His lips curved against my skin. I felt the smile more than saw it. “Seemed like someone needed to do it.”

“And you nominated yourself?” I shifted, turning onto my back so I could look at him properly. The room was still dim, even with the large windows. The early morning fog outside made everything soft and gray, but I could see his face well enough. The beard. The dark lashes. The way his mouth looked softer when he wasn’t holding it in that tight line he used on everyone else. “You don’t do anything by accident, Antonio Miles.”

He didn’t deny it. His arm stayed across my waist, heavy and warm, and he studied me with those dark eyes that missed absolutely nothing. “You left your door unlocked.”

“I did.”

“Why?”

I held his gaze and made myself not look away. “Don’t you know?”

“Yes. But I want you to say it so we understand each other.”

I could have played coy or pretended like I’d left the lock disengaged on accident, but why? Why not just tell him the truth? Before I could change my mind, I laid it out there for him. “Because I wanted you here.”

He started slightly. “I didn’t expect you to tell the truth.”

“I think maybe I’ve just been insulted.”

He chuckled. “I like this side of you.”

“What? Sleepy?”

“Correct me if I’m wrong, but I do believe you’re not the least bit afraid of me. In fact, I’d go so far as to say I make you feel safe. You know I’ll fight your demons.”

“I don’t need anyone fighting my demons, Tonio. I can do that myself.”

“I know you can,” he said. “Doesn’t mean you have to.”

My throat tightened. I hated that. Hated how easily he could find the soft spots I worked so hard to armor over. I turned my head away, staring at the ceiling. “You should go. I’m fine. I’m sure you’ve got things to do.”

His arm didn’t move. “You’re not fine.”