Page 11 of Arctic Titans of Northwood U: Volume 2

“What? No.” His voice cracked a little. It wouldn’t have been the first time we were out of town and Sawyer missed Noah so much that they needed to “chat privately.” I resolutely did not think of what Sawyer did in our shared room on such occasions. “I’m just asking,” he explained. “You never miss an opportunity when we’re away. That’s all.”

“Oh,” I said. That wasn’t entirely true. It wasn’t completely false, either. “I’m tired.” It was a lame excuse. I held my breath for a time, then exhaled with a new sense of determination. “I gotta tell you something…” And the determination rocked.

“Shoot,” Sawyer said.

I was silent for a long while, looking at the ceiling again.

“You’re starting to spook me, Avery,” Sawyer said in a darker tone. “Are you alright?”

“I’m fine. It’s not like that.” I drummed my fingers against my chest. “It’s just…I don’t…” Why was this so hard to get over my lips? “I don’t actually screw around.”

Sawyer might have laughed had I said this outright. Instead, he looked at me worriedly. Probably because he could see that I was having a hard time talking. We had always been close, but neither of us was particularly chatty. Our friendship was built on mutual understanding and respect rather than long-winded conversations.

I sat up abruptly, set my feet on the floor between our beds, and rested my elbows on my knees. “I mean, I was, but not as much as you think.”

Sawyer sat up partially, lifting the pillow to rest his back on it against the headboard. “Um…okay? Wait, is there something bad about that?”

I thought about it for a moment. The worst of it was simple. “I lied. By omission.”

Sawyer flattened his eyebrows and snorted. “Half the guys exaggerate, Avery. We’re good.” And after a moment, he added, “Are you sure everything’s fine?”

I scratched my head in frustration. “It’s just that I can’t make a lot of sense out of it myself.” And I wasn’t sure I wanted to spill all the details to Sawyer. I didn’t even know what this thing with Grayson Reed was except that it tickled me somewhere deep in my chest. “We’re in college. Everyone’s always hooking up and then telling the tale. It’s almost part of the mandatory curriculum at this point.”

Sawyer laughed. “Your comedy classes are paying off.”

I wasn’t taking any comedy classes. It didn’t matter right now. “For the sake of being honest, I gotta admit, I never liked it that much. So I was thinking, maybe there’s something wrong with me. I remember you last year, before you met Noah, living for it. Night after night, dude. You didn’t miss a single party on campus for an entire semester. Me? I couldn’t care less if I scored with someone.”

Sawyer let out a long exhale. “There’s nothing wrong with you, man.”

“You think so? Because I feel like there really is. I feel like I’m seriously messed up because I’m not nearly as interested in hooking up as you all were.” I rubbed my face.

Sawyer’s silence was short. He shifted and set his feet on the floor. “You need to remember that I lost all that interest when I met the right guy. Frankly, it was a little sad. I didn’t know what I was missing before my lessons with Noah started. Maybe it’s everyone else that’s mad. Did you think about that?”

I snorted. “Right. That’s not really how madness works, though.”

“Let me ask you something,” he said carefully. “What brought this on?”

It was my turn to be quiet for a time. And when I spoke, I tried to be as careful about the details as possible. “Okay…there’s this guy. He’s really attractive. And I mean, really hot.”

“Grayson.”

I looked up at Sawyer’s amused smile, my heart torn between leaping at the mention of his name and sinking with dread at the secret being out. “Not naming any names.”

“Oh. Got it. But…it’s Grayson.” Sawyer laughed out loud.

“Why would you even think that?” I demanded.

“Because he asked for your number,” Sawyer explained. “And I told him to ask you personally.” He rubbed his hands, excitement rising to his face. “Alright, so what about this ‘hot guy?’”

I sniffed. “This doesn’t leave the room, alright?”

Sawyer gestured to zip his lips and nodded his agreement.

It had been easier to talk when it was a secret, but I was too deep into it to pull out now. “I dunno. He’s into me, I guess. He’s been asking me out on a date nearly every day since the party. I said I wouldn’t, but he isn’t taking ‘no’ for an answer.”

“If he’s bothering you…”

I interrupted him right there. “It’s not like that. Between you and me, I kind of like it. He’s really trying.”