Page 143 of My Brother’s Best Friends Entanglement

Nobody speaks for a second.

“Okay.” Marcus says it slow, each word its own sentence. “If it's too much pressure right now, with everything going on, we can take a step back. Slow down. Whatever you need.”

“No.” I shake my head. “Not a break. Permanently. This. Us. All of us. It's over.”

I want to walk away, but I owe them the rest of this conversation. Or maybe I owe it to myself, to savour these last few moments with them.

“No.” Zachary's on his feet now, shaking his head like he wants to erase the memory of the words I've just spoken. “That's not what we want.”

“It doesn't matter.” I harden my voice. “You don't get to decide this.”

“Neither do you,” Rhys says, and there's an edge in it I've never heard from him. “You don't get to make this decision for the four of us on your own. Not here, not like this. Not because you're scared.”

“I'm not scared, I'm being realistic. Nothing good has come out of this. Nothing! Look where we are, Rhys.”

I turn away from them, let my chin quiver for one second, then wipe my hand against my eyes and face them again.

“That's not true and you don't really feel that way,” Marcus says, his voice soaked in hurt.

And I wish I could tell him that of course I don't. That the time with him, with all of them, was the best of my life. But I don't. This is the best way.

“It's not true, Alexia,” Zachary says, quieter.

I swallow down the words on my tongue, and remind myself why I'm doing this.

“Isn't it? My brother is back in surgery. My whole department watched Craig call me a—” I can't finish it. “And Leon heard it. My big brother, who I've idolised and who has protected me my whole life, heard the horrible things a colleague said about me. And the only thing he took away from it is that all the people he loves and trusts most have been lying to him for months! We can't keep doing this to him. He's my family! I've nearly lost him twice in one month, and I am not risking that again for⁠—”

My voice trails off. Because I can't say it.

“For us,” Zachary finishes for me.

“That's not what I meant.”

“It's exactly what you meant.” His voice is rising now, control slipping. “You're choosing him over us. Which—fine. He's your brother. But don't stand there and pretend it's some noble sacrifice when it's really just you finally admitting that we don't matter.”

The look of hurt on his face is almost too much for me to bear. But I do.

“Of course you matter. You know that's not what I mean. And I've never thought I was being noble. None of what I've done lately is noble. I'm trying to keep my family safe from being hurt again.”

“You don't get it, do you? You are our family too.” Marcus, loud now, the words coming out furious. “Not just Leon. You've been part of this family since before any of this started, Alexia, and you don't get to just erase that.”

“Family doesn't put each other through this.” My voice is shaking now. “Wouldn't it be easier, for all of you, if you didn't have to choose? Between him and me? If you never had to be put in a position where you had to worry about losing him?”

Nobody answers straight away.

But then I see it happen — a split second of what if. What if none of this had ever happened?

I latch onto it anyway.

“See,” I say, quieter now. “Even you know it.”

“No.” Rhys's face changes fast, alarm chasing out whatever was there a second ago. “That's not what I was thinking. I would never want to know what my life would be without yo⁠—”

“We can't keep doing this.” I say it over him, because if I let him finish, I don't know if I'll be able to hold onto the decision at all. “I know it's not fair on you. Any of you. And you can't keep having to wait around for me to make up my mind.” I swallow down what feels like pieces of my heart splintering off. “So I've made it. We are over.”

Nobody moves.

Then a doctor appears at the end of the corridor, calling my name.