Page 88 of Xavier

“And… how well does he know you?” I say, remembering Kaine’s comments scattered throughout the night that he might know more about me than I know about him.

“You have to understand, Malynda, he literally scooped me up out of the gutter.”

“You didn’t answer my question.”

“He knows everything.”

“So everything he said was true? Were you… were you really that much of a wreck?”

“What did you think? That I was just going to let you go? I meant my promises to you, Malynda. Every single one. One letter wasn’t going to change that. So yes, everything he said was true. He knows everything.”

“Including we being together now?”

“I didn’t tell him but I’m guessing he’s caught on.”

“He doesn’t seem too pleased about it.”

Xavier doesn’t reply, just squeezes my hand and leans over, brushing his lips against mine. I forget everything for a moment, falling into his arms, remembering how I’m already becoming addicted to the comfort it brings me.

I swivel around on the leather seat and lean back against his chest. It’s warm and blooms against my body as he takes deep breaths.

All these years I’ve lived a life of my own creation. My real name, my past, locked behind a door in my mind. I didn’t think I was ever going to be confronted by it again.

But here it is.

The implication that Xavier wasn’t safe with me stings like a drop of acid down my sternum. But he’s right.

And I know I should end this, before we fall too far.

But I can’t.

“Mmmm,” Xavier mumbles low into my ear and I turn to see his eyes fluttering closed as his head bobs forward, his cheek against my forehead.

I pull his arm tighter around me, and let myself dream.

Just one more day.

***

“Wake up, sweetheart. Wake up, it’s just a dream!”

“Don’t go!” I hear myself scream. My mouth is bone dry, almost cracking at the corners where I’ve opened my mouth to scream.

“What? Go where?”

“Just… don’t go,” I plead, wrapping my arms around his neck, burying my face in the sweaty crook of his neck.

“Shhhhh, it’s okay. I’m not going anywhere.”

“You promise?” I ask him, even though I know it’s unfair of me.

“A hundred times. I promise it a hundred times,” he whispers, running his fingers up and down my spine.

I forget how many times I ask him to say it again, but it’s still there, soft in my ears, as I finally fall back asleep, taking him with me into my dreams.