She has one hand raised, holding on to his chin, and the other lying limp at her side. She sucks on her pacifier, and when her eyes dart up and she sees me, she sits up with a big smile that nearly causes the pacifier to fall from her mouth.
“Ready for Mags to rock you?” he whispers, brushing a kiss to her cheek. He stands, turning her around to give her a full body hug before he props her on a hip, looking over at me.
“She’ll probably fall asleep while you rock,” he says, handing her to me. I tuck my hands under her arms, carefully pulling her to my chest.
“If you’re feeling bold, you can lay her down when she’s drowsy, and sometimes, she falls asleep on her own. Works like, one percent of the time, but usually, if she’s not passed out, she screams and gets pissed that you even tried.”
I giggle at that. “I want to rock her until she’s sleeping.”
He looks down at Ivy, a hand coming up to brush over her hair. Her cheek is pressed to my chest, and we’re both looking up at him. “How did I get so lucky?” he murmurs. “How did I get lucky enough to deserve to have the two of you in my life?”
My heart thunders in my chest, and I go to smile, but my lower lip wobbles instead. “We could say the same thing about you.”
He kisses Ivy once more, and then me, leaving the room and quietly shutting the door behind him.
I grab her fuzzy yellow blanket from the bassinet and drape it over her shoulders before we settle into the rocking chair.
It takes her a moment to relax against my chest. Her legs stretch, then kick, and she moves until she’s adjusted herself somewhat comfortably. I watch as her eyes close halfway then hover, as if she’s fighting sleep because she knows staying awake is way more fun.
With the soft sway of the chair, I feel my own eyes get heavy. But once hers fall shut for sure, I continue the slow, steady motion, letting her fall into a deep sleep before I dare try to transfer her to her bassinet.
I lay her down on her back, my movements slow, and when she’s settled, I crawl into Lukas’s bed beside her, rolling onto my side to face her.
I watch the slow rise and fall of her chest, smiling to myself at the fluttering of her lashes, and the soft wiggles of her mouth. Some innate part of me pulls to her, and even though I’m this close, it doesn’t feel close enough. Adjusting my pillow, I inch closer to the edge of the bed so I can reach my arm down, resting it atop hers.
She wiggles, and I freeze, a curse ready to slip from my mouth if I wake her up. But instead, she rolls to the side, and her little hand finds mine in the darkness of the room. She curls her hand around my finger, and with my next exhale, my body relaxes and sleep takes over.
A dip in the bed wakes me, and when my eyes dart open, the room is shrouded in darkness.
Ivy has rolled onto her back, still sound asleep, and I look over my shoulder just as Lukas lifts the covers to climb in behind me. “Sorry to wake you, sweetheart.”
“It’s okay,” I whisper.
He curls in behind me, pulling the blankets up over my shoulder before his arm comes to wrap around my waist, tugging me to him. We’re pressed up against one another, my back to his chest, and his lips brush against the side of my neck.
I take in a heavy breath, sleep already trying to pull me under, when a laugh from downstairs nearly rumbles the house.
“Theo came back to hang out,” Lukas mumbles. “The asshole better not keep us up.”
His voice is low, already ragged from sleep, and I settle in, listening to the laughter filter from below.
And then, it hits me. When Lukas was trapped in that burning vehicle, this is what he imagined. Maybe it was summer instead of February. Maybe there was a warm breeze filtering through the window instead of icicles slapping the glass. But as his body warms me from behind, with Ivy’s soft breathing in front of me, I realize that I don’t need anything else in this life other than the people in this room.
“Lukas?”
“Hmm?”
I tuck my arm under the blanket, finding his and sliding my hand to lace our fingers together. “This is my version of heaven, too.”
CHAPTER 39
Magnolia
Itwist the lock in my apartment door, and the moment it swings open, I throw my bag on the floor, kicking it across the room for good measure.
My throat burns, and I slump to the ground, sitting in the near darkness of my apartment as the sun sets through the balcony door. I let myself cry, releasing all the emotions that I’ve been forcing myself to hold tight.
It took every ounce of strength I had to leave Copper Ridge. Four full days filled with the people I love the most in this world. Four nights of being held in Lukas’s arms. Mornings drinking coffee with him in a quiet living room. Afternoons belly laughing with Ivy. Dinner with my family, with Nana. Tears streaming down my face as the Hart siblings rag on one another.