Page 134 of To All the Guys I Killed Before

My knees hit cold concrete.

A body.

Delay and she dies.

Activity swirls around me. Running. Shouting. Someone brushing past me.

Me, who stalled the cops while she was bleeding, dying⁠—

“Dr. Mohr?”

I lift my head to see Azad standing over me, her expression unreadable. “Can you please come with me?”

I nod jerkily and climb to my feet. I can do this.

My dread grows with each step I take into the house, up the stairs, toward that well-lit room. Death can leave a charge in the air, a sense of wrongness that cops and killers recognize. I feel it before I hit the landing. I’m sure Azad did too.

She ushers me into Overton’s bedroom, and I have to lock my knees to keep them from buckling a second time.

A body is sprawled on the floor.

It’s Overton.

Delay and she gets away.

My eyes lift to the window opposite us. It’s open, allowing cold air and gusts of snow to drift in. The sill is covered in blood.

“You had a recent altercation with Ray Overton, did you not, Dr. Mohr?”

I nod and point to the pink, shiny line on my forehead, although I can’t drag my eyes from that bloody line of wood under the window. “He’s dangerous.”

She glances at my scar before returning her gaze to Overton. “Not anymore.”

She tilts her head, taking in the ragged cut in his neck, the multiple bleeding wounds on his trunk, the snarl permanently affixed to his ashen face. “Guys like this throw their weight around, bully people they think are weaker, cry crocodile tears, and promise to change.”

“But they don’t,” I say faintly.

“They don’t,” she agrees, turning to face me. Framing me in the center of her body cam. “Lindsay is dead. I’m sorry.”

I blink, not shocked by the news but shocked that she told me so bluntly.

“What?” I ask, hoping it’s convincing. Aware that I’ve made myself a suspect by turning up here.

Not like I’d be anywhere else tonight.

Azad’s still looking at me. “Were you two involved?”

“What?” I’m certainly not faking that one.

“I’ll take that as a no,” she says with a small laugh. “Would it break confidentiality to tell me if you can think of anyone who might want to kill Ray? Other than, well, you?”

My answering laugh is strained. “Sounds like it’s good you saw me drive up tonight.”

“Yep.” She walks to the open window, and I join her. Up close, there’s too much blood for me to bear. Looking down at the long drop to the stone terrace below doesn’t help. The scuffs in the snow underneath us are already filling in, although streaks of blood stand out in the floodlights. I silently urge the wind to blow harder as Roberts and two newly arrived officers fan out, one taking pictures of the depressions and the other following Roberts toward the back of the property.

Please be okay, baby.

“You’ll give your statement to the detective when he arrives.” Azad isn’t asking me, but I nod woodenly anyway, spinning away from the window to look at Overton again. I decided a divorce lawyer and a video would stop him. I decided to let him live so I could keep Rue. And Lindsay died.