Page 27 of Adoring Ink

That was the best for everyone.

When he pulled up to her cottage, he figured he’d lied to himself enough to get through this. She opened the door on the first knock and frowned at him.

“I didn’t know you were coming by.” Her voice wasn’t angry or hurt, just confused.

He really was an asshole.

“I left early yesterday and wanted to see you.” That much was the truth.

“Oh,” she said as she stepped aside to let him in. “I was just finishing working out and was about to jump in the shower.”

He looked up and down her body, his mouth watering at the sight of the sweat rolling between her breasts and her tight workout outfit molding to every curve. He reached out and gripped her hip. “I like these pants,” he said roughly. “They hug you just right.”

She rolled her eyes. “I’m glad you think so.” She reached up and kissed his chin, and he lowered his head so he could take her lips. It was a quick kiss, but it was so filled with heat, he had to back away before he did something stupid.

Like, throw her down on the floor to rut like some animal.

“Did you want something to eat while I shower?” she asked, and he shook his head.

“I’m sorry for leaving like I did,” he blurted. Hell, he hadn’t meant to say that.

She froze. “It’s okay.”

“No. It’s not. You opened yourself up and I left. I’m sorry.”

She wrapped her arms around her waist even as he slid his hands over her shoulders. “I get it.”

“But you shouldn’t.” He sighed and backed away. He couldn’t touch her and think. “I don’t do well in relationships, Holly. I never have.”

She tilted her head. “Then what are we doing?”

He ran his hand through his hair. “I don’t know. That’s the problem.”

She raised her chin. “The door is right behind you if it’s such a problem.”

He cursed under his breath and shook his head. “Fuck. I’m doing this all wrong.”

“Yeah, I think you are.”

He loved it when she stood up for herself and spoke her mind, but right then, he wanted to shake some sense into both of them. “I’ve never loved anyone, Holly. Not since I was a kid. I don’t know how to do it, and I don’t think I can.”

Her face paled. “Good to know.” Her voice had gone hollow, and he wanted to hold her, but he knew it would be the worst thing he could do.

He took a deep breath and told her the one thing he’d never told another soul. “My sister died when I was a kid, and it was my fault.”

Her eyes widened. “What?”

She reached out for him, but he took a step back. Once again, he ignored the hurt and confusion on her face. He had to, or he’d break.

He couldn’t break.

“I was eleven and supposed to be watching my sister. Our house in Texas was one of the lucky ones with a pool. My parents were inside, yelling at each other and throwing things like usual. They told me to take Sarah outside, and I did. But I was tired of watching her since that was all I did that summer so I took my Game Boy with me. She was splashing around and doing her thing, and since she was a decent swimmer, I wasn’t paying attention.”

Holly put her hands on his arms, and he let out a breath. He hadn’t realized he’d crossed them over his chest, blocking himself off from the world. From her.

“She dove into the deep end like she always did, but, apparently, she did it wrong.”

Bile filled his throat, and he did his best to not throw up right then and there.