Page 101 of Break My Heart

Expectation.

Before I can urge Christin to escape out a side exit, he’s headed toward us, snapping out my name. “Leo!”

Long-suppressed training roots me in place. Christin squeezes my fingers. The action isn’t missed by my father, judging by the way his eyes drop to them before his lip curls with disgust. Years of his contemptuous conditioning hold me there before something inside me snaps. The fear I spent my entire childhood feeling burns away, leaving nothing behind but anger.

When he’s in front of us, he dismisses Christin by saying, “I’d like to speak with my son. Alone.”

But she doesn’t let go of me. Not even for a second. “No. I don’t think so.”

His face turns puce. He looks like he’s about to rip into her when she steps closer to me, supporting me. But her words give me untold strength. “What you have to say to Leo, you can say in front of me, or you can leave. Those are your choices.”

He sneers at her like she’s inconsequential when in my world, she’s the only thing that matters. Still, he ignores her and demands, “You’re coming home.”

No preamble. Just Alfred Hawthorne commanding in the exact same tone as if a decade hasn’t passed since I last saw him.

I don’t speak, which infuriates him. He lashes out, “You’ve embarrassed this family long enough.”

That’s when my heart catches up to my mouth and I retort, “What family?”

He ignores my insult and plows on. “You besmirched our good name for what? A hobby?”

“Racing is not a hobby,” I growl.

For just a moment, I’m transported back into my father’s study where he’s reprimanding me.

“You’ve never been exceptional, Leo. Consistent, perhaps. But not exceptional.”

The words sink into the anatomy of my cells. It’s then I realize I’ll never be free so long as I live this life.

I endeavor to endure another lecture enumerating how I’m an embarrassment to my family. My father doesn’t disappoint me. “You don’t lead; you follow. You always have. That’s why your brother will inherit everything,” he adds. “Because he understands what it means to be more than adequate.”

The memory slams me back into the present so hard it almost knocks me down. I stare at him, not saying a word. Still, he’s contemplating me like I’m someone he can snap his fingers at to get in line.

“You’re coming home,” he repeats.

“No, I don’t think I will. Thank you very much,” I say.

Though my words are polite, their very dismissiveness insults him. But he refuses to let me go despite his irritation. “You don’t seem to understand,” he says. “Your brother is dead. Your sister-in-law and nephew as well.”

Christin gasps. That’s the only sound I recognize in a world that has stopped spinning.

“What?” The word is a breath that escapes my parted lips. “How?”

“A car accident with an out-of-control driver,” he says, tone flat. “No doubt, the other driver was doing something foolish, like your bloody racing.”

My stomach curdles. I try to make sense of what he’s saying. Albert is dead. My nephew is gone. I stagger back a half step when the realization fully hits. Christin’s hand tightens around mine, anchoring me before I can completely lose my footing.

“You will come back,” my father sneers, like that’s the only part of this that matters. “There are responsibilities to assume.”

Responsibilities. His oldest son and his family perished and he’s not here to discuss grief or mourning. Nothing so mundane as humanity. Just the expectation that I’ll give up my life to continue the Hawthorne line.

My vision blurs at the edges, something violent and suffocating rising in my chest. For a second, I think I’m going to pass out until I hear Christin snap, “You don’t get to do this.”

Her voice cuts through the fog I was under.

I turn slightly, barely cognizant of Christin dropping my hand. It isn’t until she steps forward, putting herself between me and my father without hesitation, that I realize she’s shielding me. Her voice rises when she rants, “You don’t get to show up after ten years and issue orders like he’s still under your control. You sure as hell don’t get to deliver news about his brother and his family like that.”

God, I’ve never loved her more. It makes me want to tear my father apart when her defense of me causes his cold gaze to land on her. “And who do you think you are?”