Page 154 of Hard Pass

I glance up from my wine and narrow my eyes at Willa. “You’re such a supportive friend.”

“I am,” she says, completely unfazed as she leans back in her chair. “I’m supporting your right to not completely implode.”

“Comforting.”

She lifts her glass. “Cheers to that.”

I clink mine against hers and settle in on the small patio in the back of a bar near her apartment. The city hums around us, quieter than usual—or maybe it just feels that way because my head hasn’t stopped spinning in weeks.

“Okay,” she says after a beat, eyes studying me. “Real answer. How are you doing?”

I watch the rosé swirl in my glass for a second before answering. “I don’t know.”

“Bullshit.”

I knew that answer wouldn’t fly with her. “I really don’t,” I say.

Because how do you explain the upheaval my life has been through?

“Fine,” she says. “Checklist. We’re starting somewhere.”

I roll my eyes. Of course we are. “That’s really not necessary.”

“But it is for me so I can accurately assess if my best friend is okay.”

I sigh. Better give her what she wants or she’ll just keep digging. I pick the easiest of all the topics she could ask to start with. “I talked to Marcus yesterday.”

Her brows lift. “How’d that go?”

“He was . . . controlled. Cordial. Both of which is worse than if he were yelling at me.”

“Ooof. Yeah. That’s never good.”

“It’s like I could feel the disappointment oozing through the line.”

She grimaces. “Did he say anything about you coming back?”

“He said that until the investigation is complete, the decision whether I’m coming back or not is put on hold. Especially now that they’ve brought in a whole new team to start over.”

“So they started from scratch? Doesn’t he trust any of your work?”

I hesitate. “More like he doesn’t trust me,” I whisper. The words taste bitter. “But I can’t blame him. I can see his side. I can see the NFL’s side. I can see the public’s side.”

“But no one’s seeing yours.”

I shrug. “That’s not exactly surprising.”

“And yet you’re still secretly working the case.”

“Naturally.” I smile. “When have you ever known me to walk away from a job half finished?”

“Never.” She glances around and waits for the server to move past us and out of earshot. “So where does your investigation stand?”

“Manny’s still feeding me information off the record. I told him he didn’t have to, but it keeps showing up in my inbox.” I shrug.

“And?”

“I still stand by my conclusion. Cole’s not throwing games. He’s not involved.”