Page 2 of Worth the Wait

“I’ve never seen you step away. You’re always taking extra shifts. You’re always here even when you’re off training the newbies. This is your place.”

“That’s the saddest statement I’ve ever heard.” I chuckle, but it just sounds desperate…when I’m not a desperate man. “Maybe I do need to quit, so I can get some kind of life other than wanting to hang out with this bunch of assholes.” I look out the window at my crew. I know them better than some of their wives do. I trust my life with them and to them.

But fuck if that drive within me isn’t gone, and I have no clue how to find it again. And for a long time, that was all I needed. All that motivated me.

“Don’t quit, Rez,” he says. He holds up his hand for me to wait, while he sits behind his massive desk that looks impressive but would probably fall apart with one solid slam of the drawers.

“Why? People get killed on my watch, Sarge.”

“You’ve had a bad string of crazies. They aren’t your fault.”

“No, but not saving lives is.”

“Are you doubting yourself?” His eyes bore into mine and make me want to look away, but hell if his words aren’t the truth right now.

Hell yes, I doubt myself. And why the fuck wouldn’t I?

“Just give me some time.”

Harry doesn’t relent, because he knows what’s going on. He knows the more time I take away, the more likely I won’t be able to find my way back.

He shuffles some papers, and when he finds the one he’s searching for, he takes a minute to read it through. He twists his lips as if he’s trying to figure something out for a moment before lifting his eyes to meet mine. “I have an offer for you.”

“I won’t take it.”

A raise won’t fix this.

“Just hear me out.” He holds up his hands in front of him, telling me to be patient. When I don’t move from the chair, he continues. “It’s a change of pace. A change in scenery. It’s all right here…”