Page 100 of Last Resort

Even if my heart is breaking while I do so.

“It’s okay, Callahan. You don’t have to make promises you don’t intend to keep,” I say. Breathe, Sutton. “We both walked into whatever this is knowing that there was an expiration date to us—”

“Fucking Brady,” he mutters and laughs.

“He’s right though, and that’s okay.” I smile and stroke the side of his cheek. I want to choke on every single word I’m saying. Words I know he needs to hear, that I need to say, but that will only serve to devastate my heart. “You’ve waited your whole life to have freedom and wings to fly.” I lean up on my toes and brush a tender kiss to his lips. “Go fly, Callahan.”

He shakes his head, confusion suddenly in his eyes. “You could come with me then. We could travel and—”

“I can’t,” I whisper, my voice more than breaking this time as I steel myself from the want to say yes and the need to say no. “I put my aspirations on hold and my happiness in someone’s hands before. I can’t do that to myself again. I’m on the cusp of achieving so much that I’ve worked for that I have to look out for me.” The first tear slips over and his expression falls at the sight of it.

“Sutton.” He cups my face, and I press my lips into his palm, closing my eyes for a beat.

“The problem is that I know I’d wait for you. Because you, Callahan Sharpe, are worth waiting for. I’d wait and take the little scraps you throw my way when you come into town, but I deserve more than that. I deserve the things you aren’t ready to give yet and so . . . I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be.” He offers me a crooked smile, a brave face, and I feel better knowing he’s hurting too.

He leans in and presses the most bittersweet of kisses to my lips before wrapping his arms around me and pulling me in.

We stand like this for some time.

Breathing each other in.

Holding each other tight.

Reveling in the moment while regretting the ones that we know we’ll have to deal with in the coming days. I’ve known him such a short time, but I know he’ll be taking my heart with him when he leaves. In a bittersweet twist, knowing him has helped me grow enough to be certain that saying no is the best thing for me. Long-term. And hopefully for him too.

He does deserve to fly.

And I deserve to soar too.

CHAPTER FORTY-ONE

Callahan

I watch her sleeping. The rise of her chest. The soft exhale out. And my chest hurts in a way I’ve never felt it hurt before.

I close my eyes and prepare myself for the lie I’m about to tell.

For being the chickenshit I’m about to be.

For walking away this way instead of a long, drawn-out goodbye, because it hurts too fucking much to be with her and know I won’t be in a few days’ time.

I glance over to where my bags are packed, waiting at the front door, before I sit on the bed beside her and brush the hair off her forehead.

“Sutton.” My voice is broken already on her name. “Sutt.”

Her lashes flutter open in the early morning light. Alarm flashes through her eyes. “What—is—”

“Shh.” I lean forward and kiss her lips. “Everything is okay.” I lean my forehead against hers and just breathe. “I have to go.” Her body stills. “I’ve been called back to meetings. I . . .”

“No.” It’s a soft sigh of disbelief that has her hands reaching up to touch my face.

“I know.” I choke the words out. “I’m sorry.” And those two words are for so much more than for how I’m leaving.

They’re for not being man enough to stay.

For not being the man she deserves.