Page 89 of Hard to Love

I chuckle and give a shrug she can’t see. “Okay.”

“Okay?” Surprise rings through her tone. “Are you feeling okay? You never just okay anything, especially when it comes to giving up potential income.”

“I said okay. Can we leave it at that?”

Chase falls silent for a beat before making a noncommittal sound. “Who is she?”

“Who is who?” I play dumb.

“Something is different in your life when you’re a man who never likes change so the one thing that has to be different is that you found someone.”

“That’s quite the stretch, Chase, even for you.”

“And you forget that I know you, Finn Sanderson.”

My silence is enough of an answer but instead of rubbing my nose in it, Chase stays silent too.

I struggle with an answer. Telling her, not telling her.

“I found her and let her go,” I finally say and fuck does it feel good to just say it to someone.

“Why would you do something stupid like that?”

My chuckle is self-deprecating. “Because . . . fuck if I know, Chase.”

“You just let her walk away?”

“You know me . . . you know my dad—that I can’t undo years of fear—”

“If you like her as much as this conversation is implying, then you’ll figure your shit out and figure it out real quick.”

“She scares the shit out of me.”

Her laugh fills my ears. “You’re damn right she does. Love does that to you. It scares the shit out of you. It makes you fear having the person as much as not having the person. It owns your heart and head until it’s all you can think about.”

Her words are a poignant nail on the head that reinforce how I feel.

“I’ll think about it.”

“Go get the girl, Finn. If there is one thing I’ve learned from Gunner, it’s that life doesn’t hold any guarantees. We don’t always get second chances, Finn. But I think you’re getting yours. Ignore the shit your dad told you. Follow your heart. You know that we Kincade girls didn’t believe in love either, and yet here we are, all blissfully happy. And now it’s your turn. Geography doesn’t matter, Finn. When you love someone, you’re willing to make sacrifices that benefit them. And it looks like that’s what you need to do.”

Is that what I need to do? Give up my excuses, my bachelor ways? But what the fuck am I really giving up? When you love someone, you’re willing to make sacrifices that benefit them.

“Oh, and congrats on that interview a few months back. The Stevie Lancaster one. That was brilliant agenting 101.”

“Did you just give me a compliment?” I tease, relieved to be on more neutral territory than talking about my current love life with an ex.

“I’ll plead the fifth if you ever tell anyone.”

“Funny.”

“The Open is over in a week. You need to get your ass in gear if you’re going to win her back.”

“How did you—”

“The whole world saw it in that photo with the Greshenko match. I’m just glad to hear this time the picture that told a thousand words was true.”

STEVIE