Page 95 of Hard to Handle

“Falling for someone is never the plan. One day, you just wake up and it’s there in full-freaking, high-definition color. You realize those unanticipated butterflies you got when you saw him, those frustrated late nights overthinking and overanalyzing every interaction, those automatic, genuine smiles when you received a text from him . . . they all add up until they become love. It’s the little things that add up. It’s the unseen that touches your soul. It’s the unexpected that makes you fall in love.” She moves to the doorway. “I’ve got to jet . . . but you know I’m here for you. You know we only want the best for you.”

I look at her through eyes blurred with tears and nod. “Thank you.”

She smiles and then turns her back.

I listen to the door of the outer office click shut, to the lock engage, and to her footsteps down the hallway to the elevator.

When I put my feet up on my desk, lean my head back, and close my eyes again, I carefully examine her words.

I wonder what would have happened all those years ago had I not run from him that night. If I had just been honest instead of chickening out.

Is Brexton right?

If I wait, will he come?

CHAPTER FORTY-THREE

HUNTER

NO TEXT.

It’s the first time in years that I look at my phone after my game and see nothing from my father.

There’s relief and an odd constricting of my chest. Almost as if I don’t know how to process my post-game cool down without the anger generated by them.

As if not having that negativity I’ve been a slave to for so very long feels like I’ve lost a part of me. As if it’s no longer worth comparing me to Jonah . . . leaving him to him and me to me. Untethered.

I sit on the bench with the guys moving around me and simply stare at my phone.

This has nothing to do with Jonah, Mad, and everything to do with you. This is you realizing you can love your brother but not be beholden to our parents over life’s fate.

Over fate’s blind arrow shot in the night to ruin one person’s life and change another’s.

“Dekker? Hi.” My ears perk up the minute Callum answers his phone, and fuck if I don’t check my texts again to see if I missed one from her.

Nothing.

Almost as if she said what she said to me—confessed two things that could change my life in numerous ways like me sending that text to my dad did—but I’m afraid to face it.

Let her represent me instead of Finn. He’s dogged and well-known, same as Dekker, and yet, I feel like she has more than just her bottom line in mind from how I’ve seen her manage Callum. I’ve seen her patience with him, Guzman, and Stetson, and I’ve talked to other players who she’s secured endorsement deals for. All professional, no bullshit, all results.

And when it comes to me. Maybe . . . maybe there’s even more than a bottom line and deals.

Maybe she could love me.

Fuck if that’s not a hard thing to think out loud. Fuck if that’s not the thought that has had me tied up in knots for days.

What am I going to do about it?

Live in the past . . . or realize I can’t change the past and can only move forward?

Shit.

She followed us around the damn place and now that we’re right in her backyard and our home turf, she couldn’t bother to show up? A damn subway ride away from Manhattan to Jersey, and she couldn’t make it?

If she wanted me that badly, wouldn’t she have shown up? Tried to win me over?

So, you tell me, Hunter, what am I supposed to do?