Page 54 of The Rogue’s Offer

Louisa’s question threw her off-balance, even though she should have known his name would eventually come up in their conversation. Since that terrible day Edgar had assaulted her, she’d done everything she could to forget Mathias. A part of her understood his motives had been well-intentioned, even considerate. Every day he sent a note asking for her forgiveness. The first of his notes had been autocratic in tone, but with each passing day the missives were more somber in his request for forgiveness. Most of all, his words seemed heartfelt and sincere.

But it was impossible to trust the sincerity of his words when he’d betrayed her trust so easily. She’d thought herself free of any obligation to Mathias, but she’d been wrong. It made the one night in his bed far more painful than she’d thought possible. She’d discovered her ability to give and receive passion in his arms, only to find those few hours cheapened by his actions.

Uncertain how to frame her reply to Louisa’s question, Ophelia found herself wishing she had the tea service in front of her. It would have been easy to offer her friends a fresh cup before diverting the conversation in a different direction. Although she knew full well it would only be a temporary distraction as Louisa could be quite tenacious. Her friend arched her eyebrow at her when Ophelia didn’t answer the question. Slightly flustered, she shook her head.

“What do you mean?” Her response made Louisa roll her eyes.

“It means exactly that. What about Mathias? How could you possibly choose Chelmsford over Mathias?”

“I haven’t chosen anyone over Mathias. To say such a thing would mean Mathias and I had some sort of understanding.” Ophelia frowned as she remembered the agreement they’d made, but it wasn’t the same thing.

“Well, whatever has caused a rift between you, it’s made Mathias excessively morose. In fact, just the other night the man drank himself into a stupor, leaving Percy and Charles to carry him home,” Louisa sniffed with irritation as she glared at Ophelia. “There’s only been one other time Mathias has ever done such a thing, and that was when Miriam Wadsworth betrayed him.”

“Are you suggesting I’m the reason Mathias imbibed too freely?” Ophelia eyed her friend in amazement.

“I am, and I—”

“What Louisa is saying, and quite poorly I might add.” Constance glared at her younger sister as she interrupted the flow of conversation. “While we know this is truly a private matter, we care about Mathias and you. Not only because you’re both dear friends of the family, but because we think—”

“We think Mathias has feelings for you, Ophelia.” Louisa blurted out as she reclaimed control of the conversation. Stunned by her friend’s declaration, Ophelia stared at Louisa as she tried to comprehend the other woman’s words.

“Louisa.”

The disapproval in Constance’s voice made the younger woman wince. With a look of concern, Constance leaned forward to touch Ophelia’s arm in a comforting, sympathetic manner.

“As always, the reckless trait so prevalent in the Rockwoods has caused you embarrassment. Forgive us.”

At Constance’s apology, Ophelia shook her head as she met the other woman’s gaze before she turned her head toward Louisa. Confusion quickly merged with her astonishment as she searched her friend’s expression for any sign that her friend’s outlandish statement was the result of her special gift. What could possibly have made her friend believe Mathias harbored any feelings for her?

“Why would you say such a thing, Louisa?” she asked quietly.

“Because we’ve known Mathias for years. In fact, I’m actually surprised the two of you have never met at one of the family parties, which is neither here nor there. But what is obvious to the family is that he’s in pain.”

“Louisa Rockwood Morehouse.” A frown of disapproval furrowed Constance’s brow as she tried to quiet her younger sister. As always, Louisa ignored any warnings when it came to ensuring the happiness of her family or her friends.

“Forgive me for being so blunt, Ophelia. I know it’s unbelievably rude and inappropriate to broach the subject.” Regret darkened Louisa’s eyes as she apologized. “But I can hardly stand by and watch two of my dearest friends at odds with one another, especially where their hearts are concerned.”

By the time her friend had finished speaking, the shock of Louisa’s revelation had ebbed away. With a shake of her head Ophelia dismissed her friend’s speculation. Mathias was no more in love with her than Gideon was.

“I’m certain you’re wrong, Louisa.”

“Despite my sister’s impulsive rush to share her suspicions, Ophelia. I agree with her.” Constance said in a quiet voice. “I’ve seen the way Mathias looks at you, my dear. He doesn’t realize it, but his feelings for you are quite evident to those of us who know him well. The real question is how do you feel about him?”

Ophelia jerked her head back to Constance. Over the past week she’d not dared to ask such a question of herself for fear of the answer. Now that her friends had asked the one thing she’d been reluctant to ask herself, she didn’t know how to respond. No, that wasn’t true. Ophelia knew the answer. She’d given Mathias Gilchrist more than her body. She’d given him her heart as well. The realization made Ophelia’s stomach lurch.

Until this moment, she’d been content to view Mathias’s mistake as a betrayal simply to avoid admitting the truth. She knew it would have been impossible for him to predict a shop girl’s loose tongue or Edgar’s use of that knowledge to renew his efforts to coerce her into his bed. What had angered her hadn’t been Mathias’s blunder. It had been something far worse.

When he’d declared that prior knowledge of her financial situation would have made him insist on paying Madam Sabine’s entire bill an icy finger had scraped down her spine. The wintry, invisible touch had penetrated her skin and chilled every inch of her. Not once since the reading of George’s will had she accepted charity of any kind from anyone.

But Mathias’s words had changed all that. The idea that he might see her as a charity case had been devastating. Not even if someone had stripped her bare and thrown her out into the cold had she felt so vulnerable. It was for that reason she’d refused to admit the truth.

Loving Mathias was a weakness she couldn’t afford. Edgar would exploit the knowledge the minute he learned she’d lost her heart to Mathias. Her stepson would threaten to make the knowledge public, and she’d be faced with a terrible choice. Submit to Edgar’s demands or suffer the ultimate humiliation of Mathias knowing he’d captured the heart of a woman he pitied.

The thought sent horror slithering through her limbs until her body was rigid with tension. Determined not to reveal her heart or her fear, Ophelia rejected her friend’s suggestion with a shake of her head.

“I’m certain you’re reading far too much into Mathias’s behavior. It’s a fanciful notion to believe his actions are proof of feelings for me.”

Her heart skipped a beat as a small voice in the back of her head urged her to believe the impossible. Another voice immediately warned her to dismiss the possibility. Hope would only bring about her downfall where Mathias was concerned.