Page 49 of Whispers from the Past

‘Most of this is just accounts for the shop…going back thirty years. I think they can all just be binned.’

‘I said not to worry about the boxes,’ she tutted. ‘You were supposed to be looking for a frame.’

‘Well I found one straight away,’ he teased, passing her a small gilded frame. ‘So then I got back to looking through the boxes. I found one box of more personal stuff. Eleanor might want that one over there.’

Rose lifted the tired box he had pointed at. Translucent tape that had been holding it together couldn’t cope with being called upon to do its job anymore. No sooner was it lifted from the ground, it gave way, sending photos fluttering to the floor. Most were of Eleanor in her 50s. But one caught Rose’s eye. It was her mother. Much younger, but definitely her mother.

‘That is my mum.’

‘Your mum? What’s she doing in a box of Eleanor’s things?’

‘I have no idea.’

They sifted through the other photos until they found one that gave them their answer. Eleanor sat on the settee in the book shop with Rose’s mum next to her with a baby in her arms. Eleanor’s script added to the back; Eleanor, Sarah and Rosalyn. Sept 1982.

‘Does this mean what I think it does?’

‘Do you think she knows who you are?’

‘Only one way to find out,’ Rose stuttered as she clambered down the ladder.

They found Eleanor already up and sipping a cup of tea when they stepped into the small annex at the side of The Book Nook.

‘Morning dear,’ she offered in a cheerful tone. ‘And Luke,’ she added and smiled knowingly.

Not trusting herself to say anything, Rose simply pushed the photo across the small bistro style table.

‘Ah. You’ve found it then?’

‘So you’ve known all this time? Why didn’t you tell me? Wait, did Susie know?’

‘Yes. Susie knew. But I made her promise not to say anything.’

‘I don’t understand. Why didn’t you just get in touch? Why the charade?’

‘It’s been so long, Rose. I didn’t think you’d want to know. Things ended so badly with your mother. I didn’t think you’d want anything to do with me.’

Luke wrapped his arms around Rose’s waist, grounding her. She sunk back into his solid embrace.

‘I think Rose deserves to know what happened Eleanor’.

Eleanor carefully placed her cup on the table and tentatively picked up the photo of her daughter and granddaughter.

‘I was hurting. It’s not an excuse but it does explain why I behaved so badly. Your grandfather had been ill for a long time and he died just after you were born. You brought such love and light in our lives; our dew of the sea. Your mother loved her father so much, but she didn’t wallow like me. Even when her boyfriend, your father, was killed in a motorbike accident, she looked to the future - to do all the things he’d hoped for you both. So whilst she was emboldened after their deaths, I crumbled. I was suffocating Sarah, trying to keep her with me so I wouldn’t be alone. Around your third birthday she told me she wanted to leave the Bay and start exploring the world like her and James had planned. I lost it. Tried to stop her from going. Tried to keep you. After a terrible row one night, she packed up her car - your car, your grandfather’s car, and drove off. The last thing I said to her was that if she left, then neither of you would ever be welcome back.’

A tear ran down her tired face. She wiped it away before continuing, ‘And then I couldn’t take it back. Couldn’t get in touch with her. Susie couldn’t or wouldn’t tell me where you and Sarah were. Sarah changed her surname and seemed intent on staying away from the Bay. Away from me. I was stubborn and so I waited for years to hear anything from her. But there was nothing. That was until Susie came to tell me Sarah had died.’ The tears were falling freely now.

‘But you didn’t even get in touch then? When I was all alone?’

‘Another regret.’ She reached across the table to take Rose’s hand. ‘I was distraught when I heard and shut myself away. I just thought you wouldn’t want anything to do with the woman who had turned you and your mother away.

‘I would have forgiven you,’ Rose whispered.

‘I just couldn’t see that happening. But then I was so alone and so sad that I realised I had nothing to lose. So I begged Susie for your address. And then I started to send you little parcels in the post.’

‘They were from you? I always thought Susie sent them.’

‘To start with, they were from Susie. Then when I found out what she was doing, I begged her to let me get involved. So we did it that way. I thought it would be easier. But then I heard about your job at the library and I knew that I could help. So we put the advert in the local paper and we sent it to you. When you called, I couldn’t believe it. You sound just like Sarah. It was like speaking to her again. And then you walked into the shop and…well you have her eyes. Her wonderful eyes that sparkle in the dark. And I had every intention of telling you then. But I just couldn’t say the words.’