Page 50 of Knot All Is Ruined: Part 1

His words hit how I was feeling dead center on the target. The need for his comfort had me sinking into his side, resting my head on his shoulder as he ran his hand up and down my arm. He didn’t speak, just let me soak up the peace he was freely offering without trying to take advantage of the situation. The sensation wasn’t the same as it had been with Petru, but that didn’t mean it was less, just different. It reminded me more of times when Violet or Tori needed this from me and I just held them. Could it be that all of us were so starved for affection we tried to find it amongst ourselves during our time in the Care Center?

I took a deep breath, and the contented sigh I exhaled said more than I could have imagined. What would happen if I got attached to these men, but at the end of three weeks they didn’t want me? That was absurd. Why would I choose to stay rather than go home? Yet the thought nagged at me until I lifted my head to meet Cris’s warm, inviting blue eyes.

“I need you to be honest with me, Cris,” I said, pausing to lick my lips. “Is your pack really looking to add an Omega, or is that something you thought of to make me feel better about staying?”

The Beta shifted and pulled my legs over his so I could look at him more head-on. He lightly cupped my face in his hands searching my expression before he answered me. “Before you fell into our laps, not once had any of us talked about adding an Omega to our unit. None of us opposed the idea, but it wasn’t something we were actively seeking. Then you showed up and made us sit up and take notice. Every time one of them interacted with you, the subject came up more and more. Petru is a man who believes in fate to the point he is absolutely certain that the fates brought you to us. That we were meant to be off course trying to save Draza when he got separated from his team just for the purpose of stumbling upon you and your friends. If we’d gone back the way we came, we’d never have run into you, and who knows, maybe you’d be back in Oscad.” Cris whispered, leaning forward and resting his forehead on mine, letting that thought set in.

“Yet that’s not what happened,” I said softly.

“You’re right, it’s not,” Cris agreed. “Our unit is the one you ran into that night, and that set things in motion. When you stumbled out of the cave, face covered in blood, dead on your feet, but fearlessly ready to take us on to save your friends. That’s when Sorin changed his mind on what he would do with you. Then when I held you in my arms the whole way back to base taking stock of all the injuries you suffered told me what kind of person you are, Dani. Strong, fearless, a leader, and someone who will never turn her back on the people she loves. It made me insanely jealous of your two friends, because I wanted to know what it felt like to experience that kind of fierce love. We all feel that way about you, even if some of us don’t realize it ourselves yet. That’s why we asked you to be part of our unit, Danella. It’s no trick or ploy, just a desperate attempt to make you give us a chance. That’s the truth none of them are willing to tell you, yet I think you need to know how we feel.”

Slowly, oh so slowly, giving me every moment to pull away, Cris lowered his lips to mine in a kiss so light and soft I almost didn’t believe it happened. I ached for more but he pulled back and instead pressed a kiss firmly to my forehead, letting his lips linger as he still held my face. When he sat back up, the warmth and hope in his expression made me want to wrap my arms around him just as much as it terrified me.

“Take a nap, Dani. I think you’re more worn out than you realize,” Cris urged as he stood, letting his hands fall away.

The loss of contact almost had me whining in desperation to make him stay, but I swallowed the urge down. He must be right, I was just tired and it was making me feel this way. Once I got some sleep I’d feel more like myself and this moment could be dismissed as an act of delirium.

“I think you’re right,” I agreed. “Are you sure it will be alright if I rest? Sorin wanted to take me to the training grounds.”

“He can do that later. You weren’t supposed to start training until tomorrow, anyways. I’ll tell him, as the unit's medic, you need rest and he won’t argue with me.” Cris assured me.

I kicked off my shoes and grabbed my pillow that smelled just like Sorin, and curled around it. It didn’t take me long to drift off to sleep showing me just how tired I really was. Then again, I’d been up since three in the morning. What a busy, busy day it’s been.

Chapter twenty-seven

Someone was chasing me. I don’t know how I knew, but I could feel their eyes on me as the hair on the back of my neck rose. Everywhere I looked, there was no place to hide, no cover, just dried, cracked dirt for as far as the eye could see. My heart pounded in my chest as I kept running, pushing harder. If I just ran fast enough, I might be able to get away. No matter what, I couldn't go back there. I couldn’t go back to that life. We’d made it out, not the way we planned on it, but Tori and Violet were going to be safe, and I was going to learn how to fight. Things were finally starting to work out for the better.

Hands grabbed me and pulled me against their body. I screamed, fighting with all that I had, using every trick in the book I remembered. I wasn’t going to be silent, no more holding back. I would fight until the end if I had to. I wasn’t a weakling needing to be locked away for my own good.

No more. No. More.

I wasn’t going to be a victim; they wouldn’t break me. I was stronger than they realized, and I wasn’t going to let them see my fear. No matter what, I would fight. They couldn’t make me weak, I wouldn’t let them. They didn’t deserve that power and I wasn’t going to give it to them.

They’ll see, I’ll show them. Omegas can be lambs on the outside but when you look beneath the surface, we have a lion’s heart. One that will never stop fighting for what’s right and just, until the world sees us for who we truly are.

“Dani-girl, you need to wake up. You’re dreaming. Everything’s okay, you're safe here with me. Come on, my fierce little fighter, I’ve got you. It’s time to wake up now.”

Sorin’s voice cut through the panic and fear. I clung to it like it was a lifeline knowing whatever was chasing me was getting closer. Something in my gut knew he would protect me, and as much as I wanted to fight right now, I couldn’t. As I’d told Victor, I didn’t survive this long by being stupid. Soon, soon enough, I would be ready to fight on my own. These men would help me get there, and I’ll never have to be afraid again. I would be armed with the power to protect myself and those I care around me, never to be a victim again. Instead, I would be the rescuer.

“Please, Dani-girl, I need you to wake up,” Sorin pleaded, desperation in his voice.

My eyes snapped open and I gasped for air. Now I realized in my panicked state I’d seized up and stopped breathing, causing Sorin’s panic.

“Oh, thank fuck,” Sorin exhaled in relief, dropping his head to my shoulder. “Don’t you ever scare me like that again. Holy shit, I’m so glad I came to check on you when I did, or I don’t know what would have happened.”

The feel of his arms wrapped so tightly around me should have been too much after a dream like that. Instead, it made me feel completely and utterly safe at knowing nothing could touch me right now. It was an odd, unfamiliar feeling yet one I relished as I wrapped my arms around his neck. His lips brushed the skin of my neck, making me inhale sharply at the sensation. When I didn’t pull away, he kissed his way up my neck to my jaw, where he pulled back to look me in the eye. There was a question in his gaze, and I don’t know if it was the battle I had just waged in my own mind, but I didn’t want to be afraid anymore. If I wasn’t a victim and I was going to stand up for what I wanted, then it’s time to stop acting in fear. Instead, I was going to make a choice based on the simple fact that I wanted this. I wanted to kiss Sorin, to feel how real this moment was all the way down to the tip of my toes.

“Yes,” I croaked out, needing to say it out loud. To start claiming back things that had been forced from me, regardless of whether it was for survival or not.

Sorin regarded me for a second before his lips melded to mine. The jolt of pleasure and rightness that shot through me at this simple touch only confirmed my choice. This was exactly what I wanted. What I needed. No stranger to sex, kissing was a whole other matter. Lucian had stuck to my request, never kissing me, so I was a little at a loss for what to do. Sorin didn’t seem to see this as a problem and took control as he kissed, sucked, and nipped at my lips. Needing to feel me closer, he pulled me onto his lap so I was straddling him. I gasped as he pressed me against his erection with a hand cupping my ass.

“Fuck,” Sorin whispered against my lips. “You taste as good as you smell, Dani-girl.”

I groaned at his words, and he used the opportunity to sweep his tongue into my mouth. At first, I was shocked and didn’t quite know how to handle the intrusion, but Sorin just blazed ahead. He sucked on my tongue making me squirm in his lap, rubbing up against him. My body blazed with a heat I’d never felt before, it was like I craved him on a level I’d never craved anyone. His hand on my ass squeezed while the other slipped under my shirt and came up to palm my breast. I used to have much more in that area before coming to Asturg. In fact, I’d wished for the day I didn’t have to fight to keep my shirts from gaping or needing to have them squashed down in a bra. Now they were half the size and barely an entire handful.

Sorin didn’t seem to care about that one bit as his fingers found my nipple and twisted it between two fingers. “Is it normal for you not to wear a bra?” Sorin asked, his voice strained with his obvious need.

I cried out as he gave a slight tug making me grind into him more. “Beth forgot to give me underclothes when she hurried me to the showers.”