Page 79 of Lavender’s Lost Duke

Lady Lavender swallowed audibly. She turned toward Mrs. Howard—who was crying openly. “Mrs. Howard, would you be so kind as to accompany us outside?”

So she was afraid of being alone with him. That had never been the case before.

The housekeeper bobbed a curtsey and bustled over to Thomas. She laid her hand on his face and searched his eyes, her care and concern etched across her face. Then she turned to Lady Lavender, wiping the tears from her cheeks. “Of course I will.”

Lady Lavender led the way outside, and the cool of the evening washed over Thomas as he jogged to catch up. He held out his arm, which she looked at skeptically before she took it lightly. “How did you find me, Tom?”

Thomas rubbed the back of his neck and looked over his shoulder to find Mrs. Howard following a ways behind them. “Jack left me a note.”

She looked hurt. “He promised me he wouldn’t say anything for a purple frog.”

“In all fairness, he never opened his mouth. I was impressed that he was able to write. We haven’t practiced that at all.” He stopped their walking and turned her to face him. “Why did you come here?”

Lady Lavender sighed. “Because someone I trust suggested that the Duke of Fenleigh might be a good match for me. I came to try to convince him to consider an alliance. And I came for the comfort of his library.”

He pulled her closer to his side and felt her intake of breath. “Lady Lavender, I fear I have been keeping a secret from you.”

She looked up at him, hurt marring her porcelain features.

“I am the Duke of Fenleigh.”

She stopped walking, her brows knit together, but she kept her gaze trained on his face. “What?”

He placed the palm of her hand over his heart. “I am Thomas Monteclare, the Duke of Fenleigh.”

Hurt and confusion played across Lady Lavender’s face.

“Please forgive me. I wanted to tell you. I tried multiple times, but . . .”

“But you couldn’t trust me.”

If anything the hurt in her voice was more painful than the look in her eyes.

“Far from it,” he rushed to explain. “I couldn’t tell you because association with the Duke of Fenleigh would put you, your family, and Miriam and Samuel’s family in severe danger.” He took both her hands in his. “I didn’t tell you, because I love you enough to want what is best for you.”

She pulled her hands from his and pounded the side of her fists into his chest. “Stupid, stupid, man! I told you that I loved you,” she choked on her words. “And still you didn’t confide in me.”

Thomas took the beating and allowed each of her blows to pierce another layer in his heart. When the pounding lost some of its fervor, he cupped her elbows in his hands. “You’re right, I was stupid, and scared, and I kept hoping that someone else would solve my problems with my cousin. But I never intended to hurt you. You are so much more than I deserve. I don’t think I would have ever believed your affections to be true if I was Thomas Monteclare. But you proposed marriage to Tom Smith, and as much as I like him, I am not him.” He pressed her hands into his chest, hoping she would feel the wild beating beneath her touch. He remembered that he still very much looked the part of Tom Smith—dirty, travel worn, and scruffy. “If you love Tom, then I must hope you might also come to love me as well. Would you be so kind as to give me a chance?”

“What precisely are you suggesting?” She looked at him warily.

He’d expected this from her, the second guessing that she would do when he revealed himself. He could be patient and wait for her to see that he and Tom Smith were one and the same, but the lives they led were vastly different. She’d prepared herself to become a servant for Tom. What would she be willing to risk for Thomas?

“I suggest you allow me to lead you back inside. I’ll explain to my staff where I’ve been. Then I will take you up to whatever rooms Mrs. Howard has prepared for you.”

Lady Lavender’s cheeks bloomed crimson. She opened her mouth to argue, but then closed it again, and Thomas continued, “You will go to bed and wake up to find an altogether different looking Thomas Monteclare waiting for you in the breakfast parlor. I’d like you to know me, the real me.”

“And what happens if I decide to go back to London or to Gardner Manor after breakfast?”

Thomas closed his eyes and took a deep breath. “I wish I could say that I’d simply let you go, but I refuse to mislead you again. Lavender Gardner,” he leaned down and whispered in her ear, “wherever you go, I will follow.” He kissed her temple.

She leaned forward and rested her forehead on his shoulder. “This is a lot to take in.”

“Yes, yes it is.”

“But I am willing to try.”

Thomas’s heart took flight. Some women might have thrown themselves at him learning he was a duke, but he just felt lucky she wasn’t knocking him aside the head. He’d always known what kind of woman she was, and now it was just confirmed. She was more loyal, thoughtful, and true. “Thank you, Lady Lavender.”