Page 203 of Kingdom of Death and Hope

My eyes widen. “What about the library? They have some of the oldest books there under lock and key. Maybe it’s in one of those books.”

Kieran hums and nods. “I’ll have Elias and Zayden go and look for anything.”

“Or we could go right now,” I offer.

He shakes his head. “You are still recovering from dying.”

“Kieran, it’s been a week. I think I am perfectly fine now. My throat doesn’t hurt any longer and I don’t have any pain anywhere. I’m fine,” I reassure him. “Alaric said I was good to do anything that I wanted now.”

“I don’t want to risk it. It hasn’t even been two weeks since you were stabbed.” He gives me a pointed look. “I don’t want you to walk out there and something bad happen to you. I don’t want you to die again.”

“I won’t. You are going to be right with me the whole time. We haven’t let each other out of our sights since I woke up.”

A full week of laying in bed, rarely getting up. Today is the first day he has allowed me to get up and go with him to his office. Only because he had something really important to do. Otherwise, I feel like I would have been stuck in bed all day again.

“I need to do something or else I’m going to go stir crazy,” I tell him. “If you won’t allow us to go to the library to look at the books, then can we walk around?”

Kieran looks at me with unease. “I don’t want you to get hurt if something happens out there. The people are still a little restless.”

“And I think it would be good if both of us went out there to show them that we are a unit and that you care for me. Let’s show them that we still care about them.” I gently touch his arm. “Please?”

He sighs. “Only if we bring some guards with us.”

“Do we really need to do that?” I ask.

Kieran tilts his head and his right eyebrow goes up. “Yes, we do. I’m worried that if we go out and something happens that I won’t be able to protect you. I don’t want to do something that I’m going to regret toward the people because I’m trying to keep you safe, but if it comes down to that I will. I’m trying to make peace right now and I don’t want to play around with your safety.”

“Okay,” I finally say. “I agree.”

“They are waiting by the front door for us. Do you want to change into something or are you okay with that?” Kieran asks.

I look down at one of my many worn and old dresses. It’s the exact same one that I wore when I met Kieran for the first time.

“Yes?” I hesitantly say as I run my hands down it. “Should I want to change? I don’t have anything better than this right now.”

“You look beautiful.” He takes a step toward me.

“Do you want me to change into something better?” I ask.

He shakes his head. “No, you can wear what you want. I’m not going to dictate what you can and can’t wear when we go out. If you are comfortable in those clothes, then you can wear them. But eventually we will get rid of them and get you new clothes.”

“I don’t want to wear new clothes when everyone else is wearing clothes they’ve had for years,” I quickly say as I raise my hand in the air, stopping him from walking toward me. “I don’t want to live a better life than them when they are still struggling with daily things.”

Kieran cups my face with his hands and kisses my forehead. “You are going to make an amazing High Lady.”

“Kieran,” I whisper, emotions clogging my throat.

“I’m telling the truth. My parents would have loved you if they had the chance to meet you. Everyone is going to love you for who you are and I hope you stay this way the whole time. And I promise that you don’t have to wear anything new until you are comfortable with it. I don't want to make you uncomfortable. I never want to make you feel like you can’t show your face to people.”

“Thank you,” I mumble, feeling my eyes fill with tears.

Hearing that his parents would have loved me pulls at my heart strings. If only they were still alive and I could meet them.

“Come on, let’s go out.” Kieran lets go of my face and grabs my hand.

We walk hand in hand through the palace as we make our way to the front doors.

“How is Henry doing?” I ask as we get closer to the guards.