Page 17 of Queen of Nothing

She leads me through the city, up and down streets, around sharp corners, pausing for double-takes, and she stops twice to check the map.

The second time, I slump against a shop window. The lights are off inside, as it’s so late, most of the city is asleep.

I wonder, “Where exactly are we going?”

“A jewellery boutique.” Serena spreads the map out over the clean window. “Oliver brought me here for a weekend years ago.”

“A romantic trip?” My voice sounds as dead as my expression looks. “How nice for the couple who don’t love each other.”

Serena just sighs, curt. “It was after I slept with Dray.”

I practically throw myself off the window. “What?”

The grim look she turns to me isn’t brimmed with guilt, but rather, shame. “It was a drunken mistake. I wanted Oliver’s attention—and to hurt him, after I found him with Asta.”

My insides constrict.

My brow furrows and I just stare stupidly at her.

Serena folds the map. “And she only slept with Oliver, because Eric was cheating with Melody—and it was a whole drama. A domino effect. Anyway, Oliver lost his mind, of course. He’s never more competitive than he is with Dray.”

The look I rinse over her is unkind. Judgmental.

But refreshing, too.

Dray and Serena?

Asta and my brother?

I find a bit of satisfaction in their entanglements and scandals and, even, their pain.

There was a time I envied Serena.

I always looked at her in the dorm, pulling on her gloves that glided over her fingers like silk, and dabbing her lipstick on in the mirror, flipping her hair over her shoulder, and I was resentful.

I wanted to be a part of that.

Serena lived a life that was taken from me—but I didn’t know I was watching a lie.

I thought she dabbed her lips and flicked on her mascara before dates with my brother, that she was about to enjoy another night of courtship or a lovely party with all her friends, the other snakes.

I had no idea then that my brother was making his way through half the student body, including Serena’s best friend. I had no clue that he loved someone else, that Serena fought for his attention, that there were cracks in their relationships—all of their relationships.

Serena was sleeping with Teddy to piss off Oliver, then Dray and Avi, all to get my brother’s attention.

I just thought they looked out for each other in a way they would never look out for me.

I thought Serena took my spot at the top.

But I look at her now, the slanted line of her mouth, the weariness in her eyes, the faint streetlight casting an unkind glare over the shadows of her illusioned, ashy complexion, and I see a defeat that I never noticed behind her mask.

I should have realised when Asta came to me and exposed Serena as more venomous than I gave her credit for.

That day in the bathroom at Bluestone, Asta outed her friend, her best friend.

And I was so absorbed in my own self and reality that I didn’t think twice about it.

I dismissed it as Asta trying to hurt me and get information about Eric at the same time.