Page 30 of Burning Rivalry

Soon, I was alone, and I was glad of it.

Even if I found myself breathing deeply to inhale the lingering sweetness she left behind.

Even if I wished I could take back every word.

12

CLAUDIA

I was actually going to do this.

Had I lost my mind?

I must have because there I stood, my heart in my throat, my knees shaking as we gathered in front of The Strat.

At least I wasn’t the only one shaking in my boots, so to speak. There was a lot of nervous laughter around me as current employees and new hires gathered together. We had started our day with lunch, one of those awkward events where people introduced themselves and shared a few words. Out of everyone seated at the mile-long table, it seemed like only Sebastian and I didn’t need to say much about ourselves. It was more than a little unnerving, sitting with a bunch of strangers who thought they knew the first thing about me, all because they remembered me from a show.

Though if I had to come up with a certain subset of the population who would remember every detail of my appearance, it would be the people now joining together to take the elevator ride up to the top of the tower.

“Come on, everyone,” Sebastian called out, almost paternal, gathering his flock together. “We have tickets, and we don’t want to miss our time.”

“Whose idea was it to eat before we did this?” My new assistant pastry chef whispered as we exchanged a tight, nervous grin. Marissa Cortez had an excellent resume and, evidently, a fear of heights to match mine. She shaded her dark eyes with one hand and tipped her head backward, trying to get a view of the top of the building towering high overhead. At least I wasn’t the only one with doubts. We had something to bond over.

“I’ve done it a hundred times.” Lucas clapped a hand over her shoulder and gave her a warm, reassuring smile. “I’ll ride with you if you’re scared.”

We exchanged a look, and he offered a brief smile, but that was the end of it. He never did respond to my text, but the week-and-a-half since our so-called date had gone differently than the weeks preceding it. He was still friendly, helpful, supportive, but he was not overly attentive. There were no random touches to my shoulder in passing, no rubbing my back to comfort me in a stressful moment.

It was better that way. He didn’t seem hurt or anything, and it was easier to get along as friendly coworkers than it was to manage his feelings.

Good thing, too, since I was now busy managing Sebastian’s feelings, not to mention my own. It was a blessing, really, how busy he was preparing to open the new restaurant. There were barely three weeks left until the soft opening, meaning he rarely made himself available except first thing in the morning and late at night when most of the day’s work had been wrapped up and the kitchen cleaned. Otherwise, he was overseeing last-minute issues, shoring up details with suppliers, meeting with his investors, and giving interviews to drum up interest in the new location.

And what happened as a result? Did I take advantage of the peace granted by his absence? Was I able to keep my head down, develop new recipes without him hovering over my shoulder with his rules and standards? Well, to a degree, yes. Mostly, though, I found myself wishing he was around, waiting for him to open the back door and charge the air around me simply by existing.

In other words, I needed to get a grip on myself. I couldn’t have it both ways, keeping him at arm’s length while longing for him.

Hadley had made me promise to take photos from up top since she had never made it during her visit. It didn’t help that she was too hungover on her last day here when she spent most of her time hanging around in the hotel room.

The way I was feeling, I would be lucky if I didn’t drop my phone before I managed to get a good shot, and I was still in the lobby. “Are you okay?” Stella noticed as I hesitated, lingering near the back of the group while we waited to go up on the elevator.

“Oh, fine. I just hate heights. And being scared. And moving too fast.”

“Oh, then, by all means, you should definitely do this today.” Winking, she inclined her head closer to mine and whispered, “Nobody will know if you don’t go.”

“That’s not true.” Sebastian would know, and for some reason, it meant way too much to do this and get it over with, if only to show him I could. How often had I accused him of being afraid or unwilling to try new things? I wasn’t in the mood to be called a hypocrite.

It was only him waiting for the elevator now, along with Stella and me. He arched an eyebrow, his mouth twitching with humor—a silent challenge. I would end up regretting not going through with it. Damn him and my pride.

While I was at it, damn him for looking so good in a pair of jeans that so temptingly hugged his ass. Between them and a fitted black button-down with the sleeves rolled halfway up, I couldn’t glance his way without blushing.

“If it makes you feel any better…” Stella offered as we entered the elevator, “… we can go first. I’ll sit with you, and we can get it over with.”

“I was already planning on going in the first group,” Sebastian added, though no one had asked. I stood between them and glanced up at him, scowling, so there was no secret as to how I was feeling. Sure, we were going to a show later, but I had to live through this first.

“I think you’re right,” I decided. “I want to go in the first group too. I want to get it over with.”

“You need to sit up front,” Sebastian insisted. God, he was enjoying this. Knowing how nervous I was, not bothering to hide his glee because he knew he was only doing it to prove a point. How did I know he knew? I just did because that was the kind of person he was. He got off on challenging me, seeing how far I would go for the sake of proving him wrong. I wished part of me didn’t enjoy it as much as I did.

“I’ll do this, but I am not sitting up front,” I insisted, shaking my head firmly.