Page 40 of Mad Girl

Just then, one scurried over, twitching his nose, his bushy tail flicking—and you tensed. “What if it bites?” you asked. “Don’t squirrels carry rabies?”

“It’s nothing a shot won’t fix,” I teased, nudging your elbow.

You tossed me a withering look as I pressed a few seeds into your palm. Awkwardly, you stuck out your hand.

The squirrel crept closer, then paused. Then darted forward to snatch a seed. He quickly retreated to nibble on it, sticking close to your shoe.

You stared down at his twitchy face, equally rapt and horrified.

Hungry for more, the squirrel crept forward again—bolder this time, deciding you were safe—and grabbed another seed.

The tension eased from your shoulders, a small smile tugging at the corners of your mouth. “You’re a nice little woodland creature, aren’t you?” you murmured softly.

My stupid, tender heart gave a traitorous kick in my chest.

Then there was the time I headed to the kitchen to grab my water bottle for school and heard you speaking to someone, so I stopped in the hallway to listen.

You chuckled. “Looks like someone wasn’t quite ready to be up from his nap.”

Another voice—a female’s, in the same English accent as yours—said, “I thought he’d be thrilled to see you. Normally he is.” Your sister, I assumed, laughing over the phone. “I can’t believe his face. He’s properly scowling at you.”

You laughed, too. “Maybe he’s bored of always seeing me on this tiny screen and never in person. Cheeky little thing.”

I pursed my lips at your comment, trying not to smile myself.

“I’m a bit bored of seeing you this way, too,” Claire said. “I understand you need to do this, Casey, and I’m happy you’re doing it. Really, I am. But I miss you terribly, and I worry after you.”

You were quiet for a moment. “There’s no need to worry, Claire. I’m doing quite well here.”

“You seem well now, but I know how you get. Who’s going to be there if it doesn’t work out the way you hope, and you go down that horrible path again where you self-destruct? Who’s going to pull you off the ledge, Casey, if not me?”

I drew back, confused. In what universe were you the type of person who had to be pulled off a ledge? And what was this mysterious thing that might not work out the way you hoped?

“I wish you’d give me Nic’s number,” Claire added. “I’d like to have a chat with him about some things.”

“That won’t be necessary,” you said tightly.

“I won’t be able to bear it if you spiral again. Do you hear me? I need to be sure someone’s looking after you.”

“I’m looking after myself. Please, Claire. I don’t want you still worrying over me like this.”

“Well, if I even suspect you’re spiraling again, Casey, I’m boarding the first flight out of here and coming there to collect you. You’ll move back with me, and that’s the end of it.”

You both went silent after that, prompting me to tiptoe forward and peek around the corner. At the island, you were looking away from the screen, chin resting on your hand, knuckles pressed hard to your lips. It pricked my heart to see you upset, so I entered the room.

“Listen, Claire,” you said, sitting up straighter and clearing your throat. “Elliot’s here. I need to go.”

“No, wait,” I said, dropping my backpack. “I’d like to say hello.” Placing my forearm on your shoulder, I leaned forward to peer at the screen, still held aloft in your hand. “Hello, Claire.”

“Hello, Elliot,” Claire said, definitely blinking back tears as she smiled back at me. “Pleased to finally meet you.”

Claire had a pleasant smile and a kind face, but she looked nothing like I expected. When I thought of your sister, I’d pictured a female version of you with dark hair and blue eyes. Crazy pretty. In my imagination, she’d never looked like the young woman staring back at me. Claire had light blonde hair that bordered on white, pale porcelain skin, and brown eyes the warm, mellow color of steeped tea.

“Oh, Casey,” Claire said, grinning wide as those eyes filled with tears again. “She’s so much prettier than you described her to be.”

“Thanks…I think?” I glanced down as you shifted under my arm. You wouldn’t look at me.

“Is Rhys there?” I asked.