Page 73 of Murder on Charity Lane

Nicholas refilled CJ’s wineglass. “He told me about his fake funeral.”

“Yeah. Imagine him bursting out of his casket like a stripper from a cake.”

Sophie made a face. “He’s this old lizard-y bald guy with sunglasses and gold chains.”

“I want a garden party for my funeral,” Mrs. B announced. “Here, in the courtyard, with a soft-serve truck and free tacos. Tons of marigolds obviously. Oh! And churros. Also, egg creams. Does anyone make egg creams anymore?”

“You mean like a Kinder Egg?” Miles asked.

“You’re my Kinder Egg!” she said, kissing the top of his head.

And Sophie said, “Sounds like it’s time for dessert.”

Lily-Ann wanted to keep questioning CJ, but she didn’t want to get the stink eye from Ocean, so she waited until she’d finished the shortbread before asking, “Did you introduce Pax to Frank?”

“Pax is the massage therapist,” Nicholas explained to Mrs. B.

CJ shook her head. “No, Frank heard about him from what he called the ‘raisin vine.’ Which is like the ‘grapevine,’ only more wrinkled.”

Mrs. B hooted. “I like him!”

“Pax almost exclusively works with the elderly. He specializes. Well, it should be special considering he charges three hundred for ninety minutes.”

“Three hundred dollars for an hour and a half?” Riley said, reaching for a second piece of shortbread. “Well, now I have a career goal.”

“If he goes once a week, what is that annually?” Nicholas asked. “Fifteen grand per client?”

“He came four or five times a week,” CJ told him. “Usually four for Frank, once for Karina, and of course he has other clients.”

Nicholas whistled. “Sixty grand a year, at one house. Not bad for nine hours a week.”

“He massaged Karina, too?” Ocean asked, not quite looking at CJ.

“Yeah, she was jealous about the time Frank and Pax spent together. She wanted to get involved.”

“Could they be having an affair?” Riley asked.

“What do you know about affairs?” Miles asked.

“More than you, dingus.”

“Children, please,” Ocean chided.

“Were they having an affair?” Hamilton asked.

“Pax and Karina?” Sophie asked.

“Or Pax and Frank,” Lily-Ann said.

CJ almost spilled her wine. “Oh, god, no! God bless him, Frank was not gay. When I told him I was bi, he thought that meant he needed to refer to me as ‘they.’”

“Ha!” Ocean licked cinnamon off her fingers from the buñuelos Nicholas had brought. “So maybe Pax and Karina?”

“My friend Angela would be so pissed,” Sophie said. “She’s got her eye on Pax.”

CJ wrinkled her nose dubiously. “Maybe. I mean, I’d love to resent Karina for cheating on Frank, but sometimes a massage is just a massage.”

“Pax Heron!” Hamilton said, poking his head in from his office. “He doesn’t have a website, at least not under that name.”