Page 68 of Son of Shadows

“C’mon, let me help.” Haruki took Koichi by the hand and led him below deck.

Her skin was surprisingly soft. Shockingly so. Koichi realized he had never actually touched Haruki before. Not that he’d wanted to. The constant complaints and threatening to kill him were a total turnoff. Though, to be honest, she no longer seemed so evil.

From the moment they’d reached her beloved yōkai realm, she’d actually been kind of nice. Except for the whining.

She tightened her grip around his hand. “I don’t bite.”

Not true. Verbally, she let blood. And he’d seen her do so physically too.

But today she was being kind, so he allowed her to take him off the main deck to the lower area. Then he quickly wished he hadn’t.

Below deck stunk, and he immediately became nauseous. Down here, it smelled like rotten yōkai socks soaking in rotten bathhouse water. Bleh!

Haruki helped him lie down on one of the futons. There, in the darkness of the ship, she sat beside him and took a deep breath. “Try that for a while and keep your mind off the rocking. I remember my first time on a boat like this. It’s never easy. Especially one that rocks as much as this one.”

Koichi was so shocked by Haruki’s unexpected act of kindness that he didn’t even reply. He did as he was told and made himself comfortable, trying to put his illness out of his mind.

He couldn’t speak for the waves, but his stomach began to settle down. The world that seemed to be spinning nonstop started to feel a little steadier, and before long, he felt a sense of calm he hadn’t felt in a long time.

In fact, the motion of the boat felt like being rocked gently to sleep. “I don’t understand,” he asked. “Why are you being nice to me? You’re usually . . .”

“Evil,” she finished his sentence. “You’re always saying that.”

“Sorry.”

Haruki shrugged, knowing it was true. She handed Koichi a cloth. “I don’t know. Maybe it’s because we’ve been traveling together for a while. Perhaps it’s because you and that shadow child are the only two I can trust on a boat filled with yōkai who want us dead. Or maybe all this rocking has made me go a little crazy.”

Koichi opened his eyes at the change in her voice. Was she . . . crying?

With a sniff, she wiped her eyes with the back of her hand. “You saved that little shop. I can’t remember the last time someone did something so sweet for me. Thank you.”

Koichi didn’t feel comfortable being complimented. He’d been trained to treat all nice comments as a windup before a strike, like a viper right before it went in for the kill.

He wasn’t sure what to say. She should be cursing him, not thanking him. “It’s a shame I got us in so much trouble over it.”

“I don’t blame you for what happened. I knew it was too good to be true. Nothing good happens to me, you know? Ever since I was little, it’s all been bad. Why would I ever think this time would be any different?”

Koichi was dealing with one of his few weaknesses—emotions. He wasn’t sure how to really comfort her. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d been around tears.

What was he supposed to do? He was trained in killing demons, not giving hugs.

He felt his stomach churn again. This time he couldn’t blame the boat.

Haruki gave him a kind smile. “You tried, Koichi. I don’t care that it didn’t work out. You didn’t take me there because you had some ulterior motive. You weren’t doing it so you could manipulate me or use it as leverage. You did it because you thought it would make me happy and . . . and . . . I’ve never had anyone do that. I didn’t know what it felt like. To have someone care about me.”

A single tear fell from Haruki’s eye and streaked down her cheek. “I just don’t know what I’m doing, Koichi. What’s the point of it all? When my sister died, I was happy she was gone. What kind of sister thinks like that? I wasn’t upset. I didn’t cry. The only thing I could think was, ‘Now’s my chance.’ And yet, in spite of everything, the Ryukage doesn’t love me. Not one bit. He never has. I’d hoped he simply needed some time after his wife died. It was tragic. And I thought he needed to heal. Then, when I started to think about it, I realized that . . . that . . . monster isn’t the man I fell in love with.”

She was crying harder now and struggling to speak through all the tears. “What do I do? The man I loved isn’t there anymore. And even worse, I know the man I loved would never accept me or anyone like me. My sister was amazing. She was special. She was always everything I wasn’t.”

Wiping at her eyes, Haruki drew a ragged breath. “A great guardian of the gates. A goddess with worshippers and power. I’m just an unknown deity who fell in love with someone she shouldn’t have.”

She gave him a hard, harsh stare. “Koichi?”

There was so much emotion in the three syllables of his name that he wasn’t sure what to make of it. “Yes?”

“I need to ask you a favor.”

“What is it?”