Page 89 of Break Out

Waiting for more.

Hoping for more.

She finally lifts her head, looking up at me. “I love you, Brody. And that scared me.”

I swallow down the emotions threatening to overflow. “Why?” I croak out.

“Because I thought the only way I could love you was if one of us sacrificed who we were, what we wanted, for the other. It’s what I saw happen with my sisters. Or what I thought happened. And my mother. I thought I’d end up like her.” My heart cracks at that admission. Fucking hell. Before I can say anything, she continues, “I understand if you never forgive me, but you’re it for me. You’re the only one I will ever want, and if you don’t want me anymore because of everything, I understand. But I need to show you something.”

I nod, and she pushes up the sleeve of her shirt, and it’s then that it registers she’s wearing a long-sleeve Orlando Storm shirt. In the middle of summer. Before I can ask why, she’s pulling off the Saran Wrap from around her right wrist.

My breath hitches in my throat.

Inked on her wrist is a hockey puck with the number ninety inside of it. Her skin is still red. This is new. Maybe as new as today. She got a tattoo.

For me.

The woman who hates needles and has a low pain tolerance. Who’s admired my tattoos over the years but staunchly proclaimed that she’d never get one.

Got one.

For me.

She got it before she came here to talk to me. Before she knew whether we’d be alright. She permanently marked her body for me. In the back of my mind, I know she could get it removed, but this is definitely a statement.

A declaration.

That no matter what happens here between us, she’s all in.

And I realize that I’m all in too.

Do I wish she’d handled things differently? Yes.

Do I wish she’d talked to me? Yes, of course.

But I feel like I understand now where she’s coming from. And I love her more than anything in the world, even hockey.

“Aubrey, what’s this?” I ask when I finally find my voice. I need to hear her say it. Tell me why she got it.

She peeks up at me. “I couldn’t think of any other way to show you that I love you. To show you what you mean to me. That you’re it for me.” She pulls her arm back and starts to wrap it back up. “It was probably a stupid idea. I—“

“No.” I reach over and tug on her arm, pulling her toward me. “It wasn’t stupid. I can’t believe you did that. For me.” My voice cracks, and I clear my throat, willing the wetness in the corners of my eyes to go away.

She tilts her head up, meeting my gaze. “It was worth it for you. I love you, Brody. I was an idiot to walk away from you. To say those things to you. Of course you mean something to me. That is, if you still want me.”

“Want you? Of course I want you. I love you. I’ll never stop wanting you.” I take a deep breath. “I wish you’d talked to me.”

“I know. And I’m so, so sorry.”

“What made you come to this realization?”

“Bri and Clara called last night. We talked about a lot of things. I’d always thought they’d sacrificed their goals and dreams for their relationships, and gave up parts of themselves because they had no choice. But it turns out, they’re both happier for the compromises they made. They called me out on everything. Why I really pushed you away. Honestly, I hadn’t even realized the real reason until Bri said it.”

I’m silent for a few minutes before I finally say the words that I hope don’t break us, but that I know need to be said.

“I need to stay here,” I mumble into her hair. “Play another season. One that hopefully doesn’t end the way the last one did. But I don’t want this to come between us. If you need me to go to Hawaii with you, I’ll announce my retirement. I need you more than I need another season.”

Aubrey pulls back so she can look up at me and rests her hand against my cheek. I close my eyes, savoring her touch. “I’ll support whatever you need to do. Plus, it’s only a year. Less, really. Then we’ll have the rest of our lives to spend together.”