Page 33 of Wait for the Dream

“Fuck,” A sob makes it’s way up my throat.

I don’t think Maggy realizes how good it is to hear those words. After growing up the way I did, unwanted and unloved, to know my little girl will never experience the same things is a breath of fresh air. Just hearing that my girl will never be alone in this world fills me with so much hope for her future, for my future. I am so grateful for the Bakers in all the ways they have loved me throughout the years, and although they say there is nothing to repay, I feel like the debt I have amassed is too great.

“Honestly, Bailey” Chloe chimes in. I give her a disbelieving look, but she’s quick to shut that down, “I don’t think you have anything to worry about. I’ve only known you guys a couple of years, but even I know that you and Aiden are meant to be together. I’m gay, and if a man looked at me the way that Aiden looks at you, I would marry him. Do not let your fear of this ending in disaster, which is never going to happen by the way, stop you from going after that man.”

“Listen Bee, I know that your parents fucked you up in a big way your whole life," Maggy says, squeezing my hand over the table. "Fuck your parents for making you feel like you don't deserve love, because this family loves you so much! We love and accept you just the way you are. What more can we do to convince you that we aren’t going anywhere?”

Tears continue to stream down my face, “While I logically know that you guys are never going to ditch me like my parents have, convincing my heart that it’s true isn’t always easy.” A tear spills over, “Your family, and our friends, have proven over and over again that I’m not alone and never have to be, but I feel unworthy of it.” I bat a few tears away, “Growing up being constantly told that you’re a mistake has a way of fucking with your head.”

If looks could kill, Maggy would be doing twenty-five to life for the murder of my parents. Maggy doesn’t get angry very often, but when she does your best bet is to get out of the way. She’s scary when she’s mad. “God, I fucking hate your parents.”

“Honestly, so do I,” I shrug, “Took me a minute to get there, but I am almost grateful they cut me off now. I don’t want Rowan anywhere near them.”

“Me either.” Maggy’s face softens and she reaches out to grab my hand. She gives it a firm squeeze and says, “I hope someday you just accept our love, and realize that it doesn’t come with strings. We aren’t your parents, Bailey.”

“Damn, that got heavy. Back to boys! I have to ask this, and I’m sorry Maggy, but it has to happen, but on a scale from one to ten, how good is Aiden in bed?” Grateful for Chloe changing the subject I laugh and use a napkin to wipe the last of the tears from my eyes.

“Oh gross! I do not want to know about my brother’s sex life!” Magnolia makes a gagging noise.

“We haven’t had sex yet. I mean we kissed for the first time last night, I fell asleep before you all even left last night. When things started to get a little heavy this morning, Aiden stopped us so we could properly talk.” My cheeks heat thinking about his rather large erection poking me in the back this morning. “But if I have to go just based on how good of a kisser he is? I would say he’s going to be a ten out of ten.” A cheeks heat just thinking about the kisses we shared this morning.

“You said ‘yet’ which means you fully expect there to be sex!” Chloe fist bumps the air like she just won the biggest prize, and Maggy gags again.

After that we gather up all our trash to toss in the bin and continue our shopping. I end up finding the prettiest pink wrap dress that will be perfect for my baby shower, and a bunch of maternity clothes that will fit for the rest of my pregnancy. It was a great day hanging out with the girls. I haven’t had as much of a chance recently to hang out with them as I would like, so I’ve missed them. The day and the conversations were needed.

Aiden

Later that evening, after Bailey has come home and taken a nap, I’m sitting on the couch waiting for her to finish getting ready. After she got home from shopping, I asked her on a date, and she said ‘yes,’ so tonight we are going to dinner then we are going to an escape room after. We did so many of them when we were in high school, but we haven’t done one in years. I thought it could be fun to show her that even if we are on a date, and our relationship is going to change some, at the end of the day we are still Bailey and Aiden, Blue and Bear, best friends for the last seventeen years. Things can change while still staying the same.

I hear footsteps coming down the hall and look up only to have the breath torn from my lungs. Blue is wearing a pair of skin tight black jeans that hug her curves in the most incredible way, with a white v-neck t-shirt that shows just a bit of her cleavage and shows off the baby bump I have become completely obsessed with. Over the shirt she has on a baggy olive green sweater that matches her eyes perfectly. She has on a pair of tan ankle booties with a small heel. They won’t do much to help our height difference, but that’s okay. I love that her head nestles perfectly under my chin.

I’ve been standing there gaping at her for longer than I realize, when she chuckles at me and says, “You okay Bear?”

“You look so beautiful. I mean you look beautiful all the time, but right now, you look especially beautiful.” How many times did I just say the word ‘beautiful?’ Jesus Christ Aiden, get your shit together, it’s just Bailey. Trying to recover, I say, “You ready to go?”

“Yea, I’m starving. I don’t know when the switch flipped, but I swear this baby is always hungry right now.” We head out the door of our apartment, and she waits with me while I lock the door. When we get to my Jeep, I open the door for her and help her in.

“Tacos sound okay? I kept trying to figure out where to take you, and I honestly felt like with Rowan being picky about what you eat all the time, we should play it safe.” I say after I climb into the Jeep.

“We’re going to Taco Train?” She looks at me, and I can’t read her face. I don’t like it. Knowing every one of Bailey’s expressions is the talent I’m most proud of. What is happening right now?

Suddenly unsure that I made the right choice, I say, “I mean, we can never go wrong with tacos. Even on your worst day of morning sickness you seem to be able to eat them. I didn’t want anything to ruin tonight.”

“It’s perfect, Bear. You know I will never say no to tacos. I almost convinced Maggy and Chloe to go to that place at the mall today, but their menu is lighter on the vegetarian options for Chlo, so we went and got pasta instead.” We made idle conversation the rest of the way to the restaurant. Once there, we are seated right away in a booth. The owners of this place know us well, we come here often, so even on their busiest they make room for us.

“How was your day with the girls, did you get everything you need?” I ask after we have gotten drink orders in.

“Yea, it was really fun. I definitely needed that nap after but it was a good day. It was good to try and process some things with the girls. The last twenty four hours have been pretty insane, so it was good to get a girl’s perspective on everything. Chloe has this way of making everything seem less serious, and Maggy being Maggy is our voice of reason.” I reach across the table and grab her hand, rubbing the back of it with my thumb, “It was good. And yes, we got everything I needed clothes wise. I can’t wait for you to see the dress we got for my baby shower.”

“You’re going to make me wait until the day of, aren’t you?” I pout at her, knowing the answer, but hoping my puppy dog eyes will change her mind.

“Absolutely I am.” She laughs, and right then our waitress comes over to take our food orders. This place has two sections. There is normal seating around the walls of the restaurant, where you order through your waitress. Then in the middle, there is a large table, that has train tracks connecting to the kitchen, and they send tacos out, and you just grab the taco you want off the train. It was fun the first time, but we don’t usually sit there when we come.

We spend the rest of the meal enjoying each other’s presence. We talk, but also neither of us feels like we have to fill the silence. That’s the thing about me and Blue. We could spend hours talking about everything and nothing, or we could spend hours in silence. Both of those are completely comfortable, and I don’t prefer one over the other either.

After we have eaten we make our way to the escape room. Bailey and I spent a lot of time doing these and playing the escape room board games in high school. We are both fans of mind puzzles and games, so our goal was to make it out of every room. This will be no different. We are both competitive, so when we make it out and hear we broke the record, I’m not surprised at all. The room wasn’t the hardest we had been in, but wasn’t the easiest either. We laughed our way through it too. I even stole a few kisses throughout our time.

In the car on the way home, I’m holding her hand over the center console the whole time. Her hand fits perfectly in mine. We don’t talk much on the way home, but as we get closer you can feel the tension rise in the air. I know this morning I told her I wanted to go on dates like a normal couple and make out in the car before walking her to her door, but I’m not sure if that’s what she expects. I wouldn’t say no, but also I’m not going to push her. She’s already scared of this going too fast, so we will go at her pace.