Page 93 of Vegas with my Brother’s Best Friends

Chapter 32: Marcus

The next morning, I find myself alone on the beach with my sketchbook on my lap and a pencil in my hand.

This helps me relax far better than taking shots.

Of course, Tyler overdid it, and Jackson and I had to nearly carry him back to the suite. We couldn’t just leave him at the bar while he knocked back shots between old stories about us and Ryan and how great of friends we were.

We all need to stay out of trouble as much as we possibly can.

I tap the end of my pencil against my jaw as I stare out at the ocean, watching the waves shimmer with a light golden glow as the sun continues to rise higher and higher in the sky. I didn’t think it would be so difficult to relax in paradise, but I also didn’t expect to find out that I’m potentially the father of Cassidy’s baby.

That’s a twist that I didn’t see coming.

I glance back down at the page I’ve been working on this morning, and Cassidy’s smiling face peers back up at me. I used to sketch her from time to time when we were younger, especially when she was deep in thought.

She’d get this almost curious look on her face that made her eyebrows shift closer and her lips slightly curl up. She looked beautiful.

As an artist, I just want to capture beauty on a page as much as I possibly can, but she has the type of beauty that’s impossible to replicate. Even if I got every single line and shading right, it wouldn’t amount to how radiant she is in person.

She’s the woman who I have loved since I was a teenager. Since I first realized what love actually felt like.

As badly as I wanted her as mine, I never made a move on her. I didn’t purposely try to spend time with her alone. I didn’t brush my hand against hers when we walked side by side.

And I didn’t kiss her when she gazed up at me with those beautiful eyes and that perfect smile.

Even if I really wanted to.

Of course, Ryan was a big reason why I didn’t do anything about my feelings, but my biggest obstacle was and is myself. Obviously, Ryan doesn’t think we’re good enough to be with his sister, but he still doesn’t feel that as strongly as I do about myself.

I’ve been kicked around from foster home to foster home. I know what kind of worth I have, and it’s not good enough for her.

I wish it was.

I stop sketching as my shading becomes too harsh. I loosen my hand up a little and flex my fingers, not realizing just how much pent up tension fills me.

I can’t draw in this state.

A tired sigh drifts from me as I flip my sketchbook shut and tuck my pencil in the spiral spine. My eyes sweep left to right, taking in the quiet, empty beach on either side of me. Other than the birds crying and the waves crashing, I don’t hear a single other thing aside from my thoughts.

I’d turn the volume down on them if I could.

But I can’t stop thinking about one certain question.

Am I the father?

I draw in a deep breath through my nose, filling my lungs with fresh air. The weight on my chest stays because I know the truth.

I don’t think I’m worthy of the dream life that I want with Cassidy. Our baby. Our family. Our future.

It just seems too good to be true.

I push myself up to my feet and dust the sand off my legs and hands before walking back to the resort, putting my back to the sun. My shadow leads me to the pool area where I can walk through to get into the resort without walking all the way around to a side door.

When I step through the gate, I pause at the sight of Cassidy eating breakfast with some of the bridesmaids. Sarah is nowhere to be seen.

Has she even spoken to Cassidy about everything that’s going on? Or is she giving her best friend the cold shoulder like her soon to be husband?

Cassidy bites into a piece of plain toast, chewing slowly as she listens to whatever her friends are saying. I can’t hear them from here. She puts on a smile that looks as fake as plastic, and her laugh is just as brittle.