Page 94 of Undone By The Mountain Daddies

I walk away, the floorboards creaking under my feet as I slip into Knox’s room.

I crash onto the mattress, tossing the covers over my head.

My hormones are all over the place at the moment—big thanks to my period.

I think about how complicated all of this feels.

That’s why I don’t want to leave. I’ll move back to LA, get busy with life again, film the second movie, and probably never see them again. LA has a way of sucking you in, forcing you to forget about what truly matters.

I don’t want to ever forget all of this.

But maybe it’s the only way.

It’s fun now, but everything has an expiration date.

The only true happiness I had in my life was Grammy, and I wasn’t there for her when she needed me. I didn’t respect her time or the sacrifices she made to raise me. She lost her daughter in a plane accident, and all I cared about was making it big. I didn’t repay her kindness. I abandoned her.

Why should the world give me another shot at happiness when I failed to recognize it the first time?

I slide further under the covers, noticing a devastating pattern, especially when it comes to men. Holden left me. So did my own father. I can barely remember what he looked like.

What makes this time different?

I’m feeling things I didn’t feel with Holden, but that doesn’t mean anything. When I look at the facts, I see the same patterns.

My stomach churns. This is going to be over soon, and it hurts like hell.

But I have to burst this bubble and make amends in LA. The sooner I do that, the better.

Chapter 25

Sienna

Iwake up the next day around noon, pour coffee for myself in the kitchen, and disappear outside before I bump into anyone.

The view is unlike anything I’ve seen before. The sky is clear, and the sun beats down into the valley. It’s gorgeous—the forests, the pond twinkling in the sun.

I inhale through my nose, out through my mouth. The air is crisp, and I love not having to share it with anyone else for a few moments.

I hike the rest of the way up the hill, entering into the forest. Birdsong fills the air.

Twigs snap under my boots as I venture deeper into the forest. A giant pile of wood is up ahead, an axe abandoned next to it. This must be where the guys store their firewood.

I smile to myself, but then realize why I’m out here.

To avoid them.

To take advantage of this beautiful place before it’s time to go back home.

A wave of nausea passes through me when I unpack what home means.

Seeing my nutritionist again. Facing the pissed costume designer. Learning my lines. Shooting a new movie and the immense exhaustion that comes with that.

I hate waking up at 3 AM. Sitting in the hair and makeup trailer for three hours is painful, and not just for my ass. I’m not allowed to move. I have to sit still and read my lines. If I’m lucky, I’ll be seated next to a friend. But there’s only so much you can gossip about with producers and other actors present.

My life consists of 3 AM wakeup calls. Fourteen-hour days. Being on your feet all day, refilming scenes until the director is satisfied. And when I’m not on set for weeks or months at a time, I’m glammed up on the red carpet, acting. Again.

My feet are always killing me. The podiatrist I see says I need to lay off the high heels and start wearing sneakers. I’m sure she’s onto something.