Page 11 of Reviving Her Highland Spirit

“Do ye use a mounting block, Lady Maggie?” Callum asked, his voice as calm and unconcerned as if she’d gone riding every morning since he’d been working here. Maggie was glad of that. She didn’t think she could stand anxious sympathy and cosseting now.

“Nay, never,” Maggie said, smiling wryly.

Callum was looking at her, she could feel his gaze boring into the side of her face. Maggie couldn’t look at him. The blood was pounding in her ears again.

“I have her bridle,” Callum said, “She’ll not move, not go anywhere. Why not try sitting up in the saddle? No need tae move. Just sit up there.”

“Aye, that sounds like a good place tae start,” Maggie said. Her own voice sounded very far away, very quiet.

It was the easiest thing in the world. She’d been mounting horses since before she could remember, back when she needed a mounting block and the interlocked fingers of a groom to hoist her up there. Now, Maggie was tall and strong enough to put her foot in the stirrup, and lever herself neatly up onto the saddle. It was a practiced movement. The easiest thing in the world, surely.

She slipped her left foot through the stirrup. Callum was on her left, holding Stardust’s head - not that Stardust showed any signs of bolting or otherwise moving once Maggie was on her back - and he patiently waited for her to continue. Maggie bit her lip, closing her eyes.

She could smell Stardust’s familiar scent - grassy, earthy, something essentially horse and Stardust. Apples, too, which was probably because they were Stardust’s favorite treat. She loved apples.

Just go, Maggie told herself. Don’t give yourself a chance to think about it.

She moved, hauling herself up. She went sailing up into the air, the smooth, warm leather of the saddle under her palms.

No.

The world went grey and blotchy, and fear surged through Maggie again. She couldn’t do it. She was going to fall.

Maggie’s foot slipped out from the stirrup, she didn’t know how, and then she was falling backward. There was a flash of the sky above her, just like when she’d fallen before, and Maggie squeezed her eyes closed and braced for impact.

5

Callum hadn’t expected the first riding session to go by without a hiccup. He watched Lady Maggie’s face turn white and then grey, and he knew she was going to fall. Her knee buckled and her hands slipped away from the saddle. She fell backward.

He darted forward, abandoning the reins - Stardust was a good horse and wouldn’t budge, Callum knew that - and caught her neatly.

Lady Maggie was heavier than he’d expected. She thudded against his chest, knocking Callum off-balance and sending them both tumbling to the ground.

She was breathing heavily, gasping for air, with that same glazed, terrified expression in her eyes that Callum had seen all too often before. He didn’t know what one might call these attacks, but they were made of pure panic and fear, the sort of fear that went deeper than reason, and could not be controlled by rational thinking.

She was shaking now, gulping in huge lungfuls of air and trembling like a leaf.

“Shh, shh, ‘tis alright,” Callum said, wrapping his arms around her and pulling her close to his chest. He didn’t know if she could hear him, but he’d observed that tight hugs and reassuring embraces tended to calm down people suffering from this sort of fear.

Maggie didn’t pull away. Above them, Stardust turned to glance curiously down at them, as if wondering what on earth these two strange humans were about down there. Hardly knowing what he was doing, Callum smoothed a hand over Lady Maggie’s white-blonde hair, letting her long, thick plait slide between his fingers. It was an unforgivably intimate action, and he had no doubt that if anyone saw them like this, he’d be dismissed, flogged, or worse.

It was working, though. After a few moments, Lady Maggie’s ragged breathing began to slow down, becoming more regular. That would do her good. At times like this, people who were panicking tended to draw in fast, shallow lungfuls of air. It wasn’t enough, and they became more and more light-headed and afraid. It was an almost unconscious thing.

A few minutes after that, Maggie stopped shaking so hard. She still laid in Callum’s arm, a shockingly intimate embrace for two people who’d only met twice.

To say nothing of the fact that one of them was a stableboy and one a proper lady. Callum resolutely shut those thoughts out of his mind.

He had a job to do here, and it wasn’t to saddle up Laird McAlister’s horses.

Lady Maggie slowly began to sit up, not meeting Callum’s eyes. She was red in the face, her flushed skin standing out against her pale hair. She had a glazed, faraway expression in her eyes, and seemed a little embarrassed. Her hair was disheveled, long strands fighting free of the tight braid. She’d mostly stopped shaking, but Callum noticed a slight tremor in her hands. Whatever that feeling had been, it would leave its mark on her. There’d be no riding today, Callum knew that immediately.

“Thank ye for catching me,” Lady Maggie muttered. “I… I’m sorry I landed on ye like that.”

“Ye dinnae land on me,” Callum said lightly. “I moved forward tae catch ye. Shall I fetch someone? Do ye need a healer?”

She shook her head. “I feel odd, a little light-headed, but not ill. I’m not hurt.”

“Maybe just sit there for a moment or two,” Callum got to his feet, not particularly eager to be seen lounging on the grass with a laird’s niece. For all McAlister keep was supposed to be free and easy, he doubted they’d look kindly on a stable boy fraternizing with someone like Lady Maggie.