Page 144 of Operation: Defiance

I reach the rolled up cuff of his shirt. I could keep going. Or…I could ask for something else.

Asher’s entire body reacts when I pull my hand away. It’s not dramatic. The opposite. An almost imperceptible shift closer, as if he wanted to follow me but stopped himself.

“Turn your hand over.”

His brows lift. “My hand?”

“Yes.”

He flips his hand palm up on his thigh. I stare at it. The calluses on his fingers. The creases cutting across his palm.

This…is dangerous. Not because I’m afraid of him. But because I’m afraid of what this changes. In me.

My fingers aren’t completely steady, but I lay them over his. Asher doesn’t move.

“Are you this controlled with everyone?” I ask.

“No. Just with you.”

The admission brings a fresh wave of heat, but this one lands deeper. Somewhere in the center of my body, where it pools and builds into a need that unsettles me.

I stare down at our joined hands. At the way his fingers are barely curled around mine. “You can hold on.”

He does. Gently. I don’t feel trapped. Or restrained. I feel…seen.

“Raine.” His voice is thicker now. “You don’t have to push yourself like this.”

I lift my gaze to his. Concern. Restraint. Want. The intensity in his eyes should scare me. It doesn’t.

“I’m not pushing. I’m choosing. There’s a difference.” My voice isn’t as steady now, but I’m still here.

Asher’s gaze drops to my mouth for a moment, then lifts. “All right.” His eyes crinkle slightly. “For the record, that wasn’t me asking you to stop.”

The laugh catches in my throat. “Noted.”

He shifts his hand slightly, adjusting so more of our palms press together. His thumb traces a slow arc across my knuckles. His grip isn’t tight. Just present. If I needed to, I could pull away.

I don’t.

“I’m here, Raine.” There’s a new edge to his voice. Like he’s fighting for control. “Whatever you need. I’m not going anywhere unless you tell me to.”

He’s offering me stability. Patience. Choice. All the things they took from me.

“I’m not ready for more yet.” My eyes dart to his. “But it’s important you know I want to be.”

His jaw flexes, and for a brief moment, I see what he’s holding back. It’s not only desire. There’s a flash of relief in his eyes too. “I’d like that. But it’s your choice. Always.”

I nod, not trusting my voice. Because he’s given me more than I could ask for—space to want him without owing him anything. Permission to choose him at my own pace. Or not at all.

Asher

I lean back against the cushions, relaxing my grip slightly to give her the opportunity to pull away. She doesn’t. She follows my lead, shifting so her knee brushes my leg and stays there.

The contact sends blood rushing where it definitely should not be. My body’s fuse is worn down to nothing, and if I’m not careful, it’ll ignite.

“You choosing this—it means something,” I say. “I can’t pretend it doesn’t.”

She nods once, slowly, and I can practically see the gears turning in her head. How she arranges information, taking in everything as data, then adjusting.

“I don’t want you to.” Her fingers flex, then tighten on mine. “What they did…I’m still trying to sort through it. How it changed me.”

Her voice doesn’t shake. She’s in analysis mode. But there’s something underneath it that’s pure emotion.

“I’m bracing for something to knock me flat. Almost all the time.” She pins her gaze to our hands. “Except with you. And that…confuses me.”

I squeeze her fingers lightly. “If something shifts, we adjust. Separately or together or both. You don’t need all the answers right now.”

She huffs. “I don’t deal well with uncertainty.”

I chuckle, and she shoots me a sideways glance. “Then it’s a good thing I do.”