Page 116 of Into Pitch

“Imogen, please. Just listen.” I plead.

“No. You don’t get to please me out of this. You were missing. You were gone. And now you’re standing here telling me the man who kidnapped you is someone you slept with?” She scoffs.

“I left,” I say firmly. “He let me leave.”

“Oh, wow! Call the fucking judge, Sadie. I’m sure he’ll understand it!” She screams back.

“I know, but it makes it different!”

She laughs, hollow. “That’s what they all say.”

My chest tightens and flop back into my chair, cradling my face in my hands.

Fuck

Just—fuck!

I yank the pillow up from beside me, bury my face into it, and scream.

I scream until my lungs burns and there is no air left in them. And only when there is nothing but silence do I continue.

“He told me he loved me,” I whimper softly. “And then I ran, because that scared me more than anything else he had done.”

I look up to find her staring down at me. Her eyes searching mine as she tries to find some rationality in something that will never have any. I can’t explain to her what Alex and I are. I can’t… I can’t figure out what we are anymore because he went and changed the game with those three words.

“Christ, Sadie… you’re not even afraid of him for the reasons you should be.” She whispers.

My brows furrow and I rub at my brow, nodding as she flops down into her chair across from me.

“Oh my god, you fucking idiot. You love him.” She rasps.

I scoff automatically. “What? No.”

She doesn’t argue further, just waits for me to catch up.

“I don’t,” I insist. “I just… I don’t hate him.”

“You don’t fear him, Sadie. You only fear yourself with him. And you and I both know what that fucking means.” She breathes into the space between us heavily.

“I’m not calling the police,” I switch back topics in desperation.

She rubs at her face with both hands. “Sadie… people die around him.”

“I know.”

“And you’re just going to protect him?”

“I’m protecting me, Imogen. Because once I cross that line, there is no going back.” I certainly don’t point out that I’ve already done shit that would put me in the cell next to his own.

She looks up at me, eyes glossy. “He’s going to come back.”

“Yeah, I’m aware.”

“And you’re not going to run the next time, will you?” She asks softly.

I don’t answer and she stands, walks over, and pulls me up into her arms again. Gentle as she hugs me close and I wrap myself around her.

“I don’t like this, Sadie. I don’t trust him and I don’t trust where this ends.” She whispers into my ear, squeezing me tighter.