Page 466 of Call Me Baby 2: Side B

molding me to him until there’s no air

and all I have left to breathe in is him.

“You—y-you… Jesus, Allison.

“You held onto it this whole time.

“This whole fuckin’ time.

“And you… Christ⁠—

“You let me stand there, night fuckin’ one,” he scrapes out from a rattled throat, water dripping from his lashes, his nose, his lips. “You—you let me tell you what it meant to me. You kissed my tattoo, for fuck’s sake, and you didn’t say shit.”

His forehead rolls across mine as he takes me a step back, his hand shaking against my skin, all this overwhelming him.

“If you told me that night…

“I don’t know.

“I would’ve never really known if I only felt like this ‘cause you wrote the song, thinkin’ it was destiny or some shit, or if it was real… But all this time, you protected this, us⁠—”

“Andrew—”

“No, you did. You did, Allison.

“You kept this real.

“This’s always been real.”

He shakes his head slow,

wet mouth hovering mine.

“Allison. You had this card in your pocket for almost three months. Coulda used this to get me to sign your contract, to keep me from walkin’ away, to manipulate me to stay, and I would've. Coulda used it to get me to do anything you fuckin’ wanted, and I would've done it. And you know it.

“But you didn’t.

“You didn't use me.

“You'd rather watch me go

“than manipulate me.”

Water slides down my back, down his soaked shirt, between our hips that are nailed together.

I shake my head.

“Andrew, that doesn't make up⁠—”

“No, stop. Listen, that’s you puttin’ me first… Above you, above you winnin' something, the contract, the addiction. You did. And I—fuck⁠—”

His hand slides up my spine,

and he breathes me in,

exhaling against my lips, tasting this.

“Ho fatto una cazzata, Allison.