Page 319 of Call Me Baby 2: Side B

“it starts shapin’ you.”

And the entire drive to the office,

this guilt shapes into panic.

I roll down the window an inch,

the freezing air slapping my face numb.

Something bad is about to happen,

I can feel it.

I can’t explain it.

I don’t know what.

I don’t know when.

I don’t know why.

But I have this sense I’ll lose him soon.

I pull into my parking spot in Soundwave's garage, put the car into park, close my eyes, and rest my head on the wheel, trying to breathe.

All I see is his navy gaze,

and it’s there where all my air lives.

A double-edged sword. How cruel is it to find both weakness and strength in him.

Raymond should be a problem for another day. I got my win yesterday, got the board to kill Callista’s deal and open an investigation. I should bury Raymond under the weekend, celebrate, enjoy the label’s Christmas party tonight, hide behind a glass of champagne.

But it’s like the car drove itself.

I must have blacked out behind the wheel, because now I’m standing in the Soundwave lobby, about to dive into Raymond’s office, return to the scene of the crime, to ask Raymond for a favor.

It’s a pathetic trade-off, really:

‘Hey, Andrew. Quick update.

‘So last Friday? After you punched Ben?

‘Yeah… Raymond went down on me,

‘but it’s all good.

“Got your mom a new liver outta it.

‘Simple little exchange. No biggie.

‘You’re welcome.’

Like this can make up for it⁠—

appease this never-ending guilt.

I round the corner, and Raymond is a silhouette behind a cracked door. I rap my knuckles on the wood as I enter.