Page 47 of Risking the Pucking Defense

“Hayden,” she whispers, her voice raspy with need. Need for me. “Touch me. Kiss me. Take what you need.”

“Christ,” I grunt, my dick twitching against my palm as I get close to coming all over myself just thinking of being able to touch her.

“Look at you, so hard. Is that all for me?”

“Yes, yes,” I groan. “All for you. Everything. Anything you want.”

She reaches for my free hand and drags it close to her before pressing my palm against her waist, then dragging it up.

My balls tighten as I imagine just how soft and warm her skin would be.

And then she places my hand on her breast, and I lose control.

“Fuuuck,” I groan as pleasure slams into me, and I come all over my stomach.

My chest heaves, the vivid fantasy fades, and the sweat that covers my body cools, leaving me alone with just the memory of the high.

But it’s all I’ve got. And it’s got to be enough, because it’s all I’m ever going to get.

Hailee is too good for me. Too intelligent, too sophisticated, too beautiful, too perfect.

I knew from the first day I saw her that she’d never give me a chance, that it would always be a crush, and that’s okay. I mean, it has to be. There is no other option.

The first thing I see the next morning is her suitcase. Memories of last night hit me, and I shove my face into my pillow and groan. That doesn’t stop my morning wood from wanting a repeat, though.

It’s always the same. It doesn’t matter who else I meet, what bunnies throw themselves at me. No matter how beautiful they are, how willing, I’m just not really interested. All they want is one night. One night that will give them bragging rights or a story that they can sell. I know that the others love that lifestyle, or at least, they did. But as appealing as it might seem, it just doesn’t do it for me.

I’ve tried. I’ve said all the right things, made all the right moves, but when it comes to crunch time, I back out. Sure, I might want to get laid—what twenty-one-year-old doesn’t? But I don’t just want one night of mindless sex. I want…more. I want a connection. Someone who’s there at my home games, who’s waiting for me when I’m back from road games. I want someone in the crowd wearing my jersey, not just because they like the idea of me, but because they know me and want to support me. Damn it, I want what Rylee and I read about over and over again in our books. I know many say it's just fiction, but it’s not. I’ve seen it play out in real life with my eyes. I’m surrounded by incredible couples whose stories could all be turned into books. I just…I want it to be my turn.

Shoving my thoughts aside, I take a quick shower, get dressed, make myself a protein shake, grab my gym bag, and head out. But not before I pick up Hailee’s suitcase. I might not take it to her today, we’ll see. But I already know I won’t be dropping it in to her office, leaving it for her to collect when she’s back. One way or another, I’m going to give it to her in person. I have to.

I’m not surprised to see some of the other guys’ cars here already, and when I get through to the gym, I find Killer and Rett are already mid-workout.

“Afternoon, Monroe,” Killer teases from the bike.

“It’s not even ten yet,” I point out.

“Kodie has already been and gone.”

“Good for him,” I mutter as I hop onto a treadmill to warm up.

I start it up, walking slowly while I find the audiobook I’ve been listening to and pull my headphones on. Once I’m ready, I up the speed and start running.

“Holy fuck, man. Is that necessary?” I cry as Darcy does something to my shoulder that I’m pretty sure should be illegal.

“Yes,” he states, continuing to dig his fingers into my tight muscle.

I knew he was going to have his work cut out for him. No one has worked on me for weeks, and it’s not news to me that I’m tense as fuck.

“You’re hitting the ice bath after this,” he informs me.

“Wonderful. I can’t wait,” I deadpan.

“Is that Marilyn I can hear crying from the dressing room?” Linc asks, his heavy footsteps moving closer.

“Fuck. Off,” I grunt.

“Aw, it’ll be worth it, man,” he says supportively as Darcy finds another sore spot and makes me wail.