Page 59 of Fall or Nothing

Mr. Wylde

Must be Sage’s father who penned this love letter, so simple yet filled with heart. Certainly, my father and mother never bothered writing to each other.

Sage had a better example of a loving relationship than I did. She was a woman who stayed, who loved, who cared deeper than thirty days could contain. I was a man with no proven track record for staying with anyone for any length of time.

One line choked me up though, rereading it out loud: “We don’t rush things here. We let them take their time, settle in, and become what they’re meant to be.”

That was the entire problem, wasn’t it? Dad’s challenge was too short. Thirty days to prove I could become a better man living on next to nothing? Why couldn’t he have written a year? Then I’d have had a full year with Sage, a year to figure things out between us, to become a genuine cowboy. It was all his fault, this stupid challenge in the first place.

The irony. I wanted to rage against Dad. Againsthis money, and this challenge. I didn’t want to undertake this in the first place that day that I begged Chris for a job.

But now, there was too little time left.

“Fuck!” I shouted, stuck, at a loss for how to stop time.

I stuffed the letter back into the coat and put it on, and then headed outside, bundled up against the cold.

What I saw lifted my spirits a little. Cars and people came and went; families and couples waited for sleigh rides. Huge bins of canned goods sat collected near the barn. Horses stood on standby so the guys could rotate them out for pulling the sleighs. Children sledded down the hill where church had been the first Sunday I was here.

I meandered over to Jake, who was in charge of one sleigh, helping a family on, and about to take off. He explained the system to me. Ranch hands took turns steering the sleigh, giving people a ride out through the pasture toward the woods for about fifteen minutes, then turning and coming back.

“Hop in with me in the driver’s seat. I’ll give you a lesson.” He offered.

“Are you sure about that?”

“Easy enough to learn.”

He was right; it was simple. And enjoyable. We pulled scarves up over our noses so we wouldn’t freeze. The sun shone in a bright blue sky, turning the snow into sparkling gems.

“Why don’t you take the next family out yourself?” He suggested and turned over the reins.

For the next two hours I rotated in and out, keeping my mind occupied, my hands busy, so that I wouldn’t think.Thinking hurt too much. The work kept me steady, and like most things here, wasn’t difficult. Almost… enjoyable.

I admired Chris and this entire ranch setup. He had things figured out about giving back and making people happy, and animals too. In fact, of all my brothers, Chris was easily the most responsible one. I regretted now that I’d wasted all these years not getting to know him better.

Toward dusk, the families had left, and the ranch returned to normal. Ash had tasked Trig and me with breaking down the horses and loading up the sleighs. The rest of the guys went to eat. Then a car pulled into the ranch. Sage’s car.

She got out and ran to me, calling my name.

“I thought I could let you leave without saying goodbye, but I don’t think I can.” Sadness in her eyes mirrored my own when she got close.

“Oh, baby, come here.” I swooped her into my arms, gripping her tightly. “I thought of you all night long. So glad you’re here. I never meant to hurt you, Sage.”

“I know, but if you could lie to me and tell me your heart hurts just as much, that would make me feel better,” she chuckled.

“I don’t have to lie about that. It’s true.” I pressed my lips to hers, aching inside. The full knowledge hit me at once, just how much I would miss her. I might even miss this ranch. All of it.

Trig got our attention, getting ready to unhitch the last team of horses. “Carter, would you mind taking care of this? I’ve got Autumn and the baby waiting for me to finish working.” He thumbed over at his sister and her baby, sitting in her car across the way.

It shocked me that he’d ask so nicely. “Go on, Trig. Go to Autumn. Sage and I can take a quick ride and then I’ll put the horses away.”

Trig studied me, then gave a curt nod and mumbled, “Thanks. Appreciate it.” It was the closest thing to genuine appreciation I’d ever gotten from him. Maybe his sister’s situation humbled him.

“Take one last ride with me?” I held out my hand to Sage.

“One last ride.” She blinked away unshed tears.

We climbed into the sleigh. I nickered, flicking the reins. The horses moved forward with a gentle jingle of bells. She snuggled into my side under a thick blanket, her head on my shoulder. Under a sky shifting to dusk, the horses steadied on their course.