I explained, “Look, I felt it yesterday. I couldn’t help myself. I watched her do something massive. I wasproudof her in a way I haven’t been of a partner since… probably Bea? It felt right. I don’t know why.”
“Someone should hire a van. She’s moving in.”
“You’re fucking delusional if you think she’d ever move into my place. She probably thinks it’s a dump but is too polite to say it.”
“You bought that house outright. You are proud of it.”
“I am, but she’s a fucking princess. You don’t understand. She drools over the mere mention of a walk-in-wardrobe with bespoke shoe storage. We are not the same.”
“Honestly, Betty may be rich-rich but nothing about her screams shitty or shallow. At least, I don’t think. So, she wants a closet? So do I. But closets cost a fortune.”
I sighed. “They don’t have to. IKEA has solutions.”
“Okay little miss Sweden, well I’m going to need a CPOL to come build me one. And you should talk. You’re quite literally a Certified Pre-Owned Lesbian from Sweden who should be capable of building her a dream closet.”
I chuckled at the notion. Clarice knew how much sweat equity I put into my house with Bea’s help.
“I doubt an IKEA solution would be on her plate. Her horse cost more than people’s houses—even posh houses.”
“Okay, but can you really hold that against her?”
“I am not.”
“Then why are you letting it make you feel insecure, babes? If we keep going, you can keep her in shoes for days.”
I shrugged. “I’m older, bitter, and she’s just so… jovial? She’s beautiful and quick-witted. She’s ambitious and assertive. She doesn’t shy away from a challenge or give up. She’s so fucking bossy.”
“Bossy? Is that a good thing?”
“Yes.” I blushed.
Clarice grinned, “These are allgoodthings.”
“Yes. She’s the same woman who inspired ‘The Balcony’, Clarice. Speaking of which, she’s coming tomorrow, so we’re going to have to nix it.”
“Is she?”
“Yeah. With the crew. We cannot do that one with her around. I would die of embarrassment.”
“Youdorealize we will have to play it sometime. It’s on the record.”
“I didn’t want it on the EP. So, we have time.”
The EP would drop in a week, and it was allanyonetalked about. I didn’t feel that the version of ‘Balcony’ was ready, nor was I prepared to lay my entire heart on the line about Betty yet. That song suddenly felt too precious.
“I tried not to think about it, Clarice. We need to changethe setlist. Let’s sub ‘Mirrorball Daze’. It is way more likely to get people on their feet.”
“Fine. But you really need to get the rest of the band on board.”
She was right, but I couldn’t get past it.
“Look, we’re doing amazing. You can rest easy. I doubt she will even realize that song is about her.”
I laughed heartily. “Um… she knows what ‘Wayside’ is all about. She is smart. She’ll connect those dots.”
“Maybe she will be flattered?”
“About me talking about getting her off really publicly and my rage about how she’ll never come down from her balcony?”
