“I’ve never even told Ingrid.”
“Well, maybe now is the time?”
“What? So she and Keir can laugh?”
A pained expression crossed Leah’s face. “Oh, sweetheart, you need to get past that if you’re going to date an older lesbian. I know Mary. She’s not going back in the closet for you. She might pretend you’re not together for now, but once you’ve both fulfilled your contractual obligations with UniVox, she won’t want to hide you.”
“It just… it feels like I gotta makeeverythingabout this suddenly. It feels silly. Because we’re not together—not officially—but if I don’t just live my life as though we are, she’s not interested. Is that normal?”
Leah nodded in Lourdes’s direction. “I gave Lou and ultimatum before we got back together-together. I said either we were all in, or we weren’t at all. It was painful, but she began to live her life far more authentically. The rest is history. I just cannot live like that. I’ve lived as myself for many years.”
It occurred to me that Leah had been in Mary’s place, as I was in Lourdes’s.
Leah patted my shoulder playfully, “Just… if you need to tell Ingy and Keir to feel comfortable here, do it. You don’t have to worry about anyone else. They either know or won’t care. This place is a fishbowl but the girls, the gays, and the theys in this room will stand up for you. It’s a line we do not cross. That’s the beautiful bit about having a showbiz family.”
I smiled. “Okay. You’re right. Time to be brave.”
I left the corner, made another drink, and found Keir and Ingrid laughing by the windows. Ingrid scrolled through pictures of their youngest.
“Oh, come on!” I teased. “You finally get out for five minutes and we’re just looking at the baby?”
“Lex is perfect,” Keir said. “The nanny sent photos.”
“Uh-huh,” I said.
“What are you up to? You’re being weird. I’m still cross about the snub,” Ingrid said.
I rolled my eyes, “Darling, it wasn’t a snub. I have… reasons. And I was worried if I stayed with you and shit hit the fan, you’d be upset. I also didn’t want to put you in an awkward situation where I brought someone home.”
“Who are you shagging then?” Keir asked. “Because if he’s?—”
“He’s not a he,” I said.
His eyebrows raised. “So, it’s not a man?”
“He is a she and it was a miscommunication,” I confirmed.
“Oh, wow. So itisthe rocker who was eye-fucking you backstage and got all weird when she met me?” Ingrid slapped Keir’s arm. “Pay up, Keir!”
“What?”
“We had a bet that she did or did not have a crush on you,” Ingrid explained. “This seals it.”
I recoiled in confusion. “I… I’m sorry, but like… I just told you I’m also into girls and you’re confused about settling a bet?”
Ingrid took me by the shoulders maternally, “Sweetheart, you have made out with women in bars half a dozen times while I was with you. You’re hornier than ever for menandwomen. It’s obvious.”
“Can we pleasenot?” Keir groaned. “In my mind, my little sister doesn’t have sex, and we never talk about our exploits.”
“Keir, she’s a grown adult who is barely younger than I am.”
He glared, always annoyed by this reminder.
“So, you’re not going to like… say anything to me?” I crossed my arms. “Like be weird about the fact that she’s a woman or?—”
“No! Oh my God, why are you asking that?” Keir erupted in annoyance. “Fucking hell, Bets! I rememberboththe gransstill being alive. That was normal. Uncle George and Uncle Patrick are so dear to me. Why do you think I’m some awful, homophobic?—”
“Dear straight man, don’t take it personally.” I stopped him.
