“Are you two fooling around or what?” Leah demanded.
“We aren’t,” I said.
Their incredulous expressions matched.
“No… we’re not just fooling around. I… I don’t know what it is. We’re not dating but we’re something. I don’t know how any of this works, so stop! I just don’t know how you got from ‘A’ all the way to ‘Z’ like that.”
“Vibes,” Leah answered. “And there are not that many of us.”
“It’s incestuous,” Lourdes said. “Almost as bad as you lot. Plus, we share an attorney, and Leah is friends with her manager. So, it’s about as obvious as it could be if you all are showing up at the same places and times.”
“I am hosting UniVox—at Uncle Olav’s demand, I’ll have you know!”
“I’m not judging you. I am glad that while I almost went home with Mary once, I didn’t.”
Lou rolled her eyes. “Yes, because you went home with that loser you were dating-not-dating.”
My jaw dropped. “Mary?”
“Your dear cousin had a very, very slutty phase in her late twenties,” Lourdes confirmed. “Delightfully complicated. I am sure there is not a woman in London—nor a man—either in entertainment or the aristocracy she didn’t at least snog.”
“You make me sound like a whore, Lou!”
“You weren’t a saint. I’m mostly jealous because I was boring and married to a total twat.” Lourdes stood and kissed Leah. “You know I love you, but I tell no lies.”
Leah turned to me. “The important bit is that you look hot, okay? You must understand you are jumping headfirstinto a shallow pool. Also, we look like the bisexual flag. Was this intentional?”
Lou shrugged. “No, darling. It just worked out.”
“I… I have no idea what I am doing. No one knows but Hank and Cici and… I feel like an idiot.”
Lou put her hands on my shoulders and looked down from her sky-high heels. “I wasn’t out-out until Leah, and I announced it on a red carpet. I was terrified I’d lose all my work and that the world would fall apart. I thought I wasn’t queer enough to fit in so many times. I think everyone does. I didn’t officially come out until I was forty.”
It never occurred to me that a woman I saw as a queer role model and who was so self-assured in her relationship with Leah could ever feel less-than. I wasn’t even thirty, so if it was good enough for Lou, why wasn’t it good enough for me?
Leah sighed, “Nope. Not me. I didn’t doubt it.”
“Gay dads,” Lou reminded. “When did you go to your first pride parade?”
“While I was still in a baby carrier, no doubt.”
“Lucky bitch who never had her parents ask which one was the boy.”
I snickered. “God, please tell me that is not a thing!”
“It is,” Lou said. “I am sure you will not get it from your mother—the one who was raised by lesbians—or your father who barely talks.”
I snickered.
Lourdes hugged me tight. “You know you are like a baby sister to us. There aren’t any stupid questions.”
“Nope. Only ones you might not want honest answers to,” Leah said. “But you look hot. At the very least, Mary will not be able to ignore you.”
“I don’t think that has ever been our problem,” I sighed wistfully.
Chapter 23
The Green Room
