My chewing slowed. October was way too soon. “Putting that kind of pressure on me isn’t going to help,” I said tightly. “Gregorios told me how the Astrals’ magic works. They allow Chosens up to a year to harness their power. Maybe my predecessors felt pressured by you to do what they weren’t ready for.”
Maryn’s fork scraped against her plate. Her icy glare sizzled through the candlelight burning in the center of the table. “Or maybe they were too busy going on midnight rendezvous to the kitchens with their guardians.”
I straightened, cutting a sharp look at Barto and Chessah. “So that’s how you spend your time? Spying, burning books?—”
“Those books should have been burned a year ago.”
“What harm is it to keep the totems of loved ones?”
“Loved oneshave no place at court.” Maryn’s nails clacked against the table. “While you have been self-absorbed in your personal woes, I have been ensuring our barons are looked after and so are their constituents. Delegating what finite resourceswe have from this drought and negotiating with the advisors of other territories, imploring them for water and other goods to keep our people alive because our princess has failed to fulfill her duties ofhudro.”
“You’re blamingmefor a curse that started twelve years ago?”
“I certainly don’t see you rushing to break it.”
“I’m doing the best that I can.”
“You’re floundering. Your Choosing further reinforces the curse will not be ending anytime soon. You’re nothing more than a mistake. A soon-to-be blip, barely mentioned in the pages of history. Our people are starving, dying of thirst, falling prey to the persuasive evils of the apostai, and you’re flirting?—”
“Then let me see for myself,” I blurted. “Your—ourpeople.”
Maryn appeared momentarily surprised.
I gestured across the table. “You won’t let me leave the palace. You’ve kept everyone on a tight leash. Even Nio can barely get away to see his family.”
“It’s for their safety,” Maryn said defensively.
“You’re not concerned for my safety. Your only concern is to threaten me into submission.”
“Mythreatscome from the desire to do what I must to keep the order and peace of this queendom.Iwas chosen by the Barons. The people trust in me more than their forsaken Astral. If you feelthreatened, it is because you are doing something to disrupt that.” She leaned forward. “Did Nio also tell you that I have his family, and the families of many other palace staff, housed in the same district as the baron? Antares is dangerous in many parts now. It’s no longer petty crime taking over but actions born of desperation. People will do anything to keep their families fed, including kill. It’s impossible to tell apostates from believers.” Maryn took a long sip of her wine. Either it wasthe trick of the dim lighting or her hand trembled as she drank. Shedidcare, in her own callous way.
“Your guardians can protect themselves. Why do you punish them so?” I asked. “Raithe, too, cares about this queendom and seeks answers?—”
“Do not address him by his name!” Maryn shrieked. I fought the urge to glance back to where Raithe stood along the wall, wondering what he thought of this interaction. “He is a guardian.Iam the queen regent.”
“Exactly,” I said, exasperated. Chosens were revered beings. For someone who claimed to be a devout believer of the Astrals, Maryn had a backwards way of showing it. “Why do you detest him?”
Maryn’s face twitched with displeasure. “I am theonlything keeping what’s left of our people together.Me. Anyone willing to disrupt that must be disciplined accordingly.”
Her words spoke to an insecurity I knew well. “Who is it that you’re trying to prove yourself to? The people or yourself?”
“I don’t need to prove myself to anyone. You, on the other hand?—”
“But you do,” I said. “You think you have more power over actual Chosens, and yet, you’ve done nothing to show for it except invoke fear and violence.” I shook my head. “How do you do it?”
She jabbed her knife in Raithe’s direction. “Hemakes it all too easy when he disobeys me and submits to my punishments.”
“Yet you seem to enjoy it. You claim to be a devout Scorpion and leader of the people, but the way you treat your own court speaks volumes. I still don’t know what I’ve done to prove myself worthy of Scorpio, but you’ll never be a Chosen queen. Not when you act like this.”
Maryn stiffened. “Choose your next words wisely, girl.”
I squared my shoulders. “I’m not a girl. And once I’m Chosen, you’re not going to treat Raithe this way anymore. Or Felaf and Gregorios. Or Letti, for that matter, or any servant you deem beneath you. Royals can remove their advisors at any point, no votes needed, which is what you’ll be demoted to once I survive,” I reminded her. “No matter what you do to see me fail, it’s not going to work. And you better pray that your desire to stay in power has nothing to do with this curse.”
If succeeding meant fighting for those who deserved it, then survival wouldn’t be beyond my reach.
Maryn’s lips curled into a cold, calculating smile. “You want to venture into the city? Be my guest. I won’t stop you.” She stood swiftly, the legs of her chair scraping along the floors. She dabbed her napkin along her red-painted lips before throwing it atop her plate and fled the room.
I turned, catching Raithe’s inscrutable stare before averting my flaming cheeks.
