Was it that he feared she’d throw herself at him again?
No. Not that.He feared his own attraction to her. She knew it, like she knew her own name. Oddly, the triumph she would have reveled in as recently as this morning did not materialize.
Instead, she felt chagrin. Because all his earlier grumbling about how she’d put him in an untenable situation by showing up here without a chaperone had been entirely merited.
Oh, she’d had no thought of entrapping him when she’d set out with Lucy, her pretend chaperone. Nor had she worriedovermuch if her plan went askew, which it had, thanks to her reckless insistence to forge on at any cost.
It had never occurred to her to consider the repercussions of her actions to him—or had it? A man like Lord Randall, imbued with honor and duty, would not shirk his responsibilities just because no one was looking.
Was that what she’d been banking on?
Suddenly, nothing was clear—not even her own justification for being here.
Except…that was not true. Some thingswereclear. Lord Randall had not killed Gaston. He was not capable of something so vile and calculated. And she should never have come here.
Her stomach, empty save for a few sips of wine followed by brandy, heaved. “Goodnight.” She forced the lone word from her lips and all but fled toward the stair tower—and escape.
“Annabelle.”
A brief glance in his direction told her he followed fast on her heel, his long legs eating up the distance.
He was upon her by the time she reached the door.
“I wanted to say, earlier, I spoke harshly. I…” He broke off with a low curse. “Annabelle, look at me, please.”
His softly uttered plea tore at her insides, but she did not turn around. “Do not trouble yourself, my lord. You were not overly harsh.”
“Please.”
A shiver went through her at the raw edge in his tone. Sinking her teeth into her lower lip until it hurt, she shifted around to face him.
His tall, broad-shouldered frame blotted out all the lamplight. He stood entirely too close—and yet, not close enough.
He grasped her shoulders. “I do not know what to make of you. You are, on the one hand, exactly who and what I expected. Andon the other…” A disbelieving huff of laughter spilled from his lips.
Anticipation burned through her as she hung on his every word.
“There’s a sweetness about you. An innocence. A guilelessness I’d never have foreseen—and beneath it all, something…more.” His hand flexed on her. “Something that tangles my thoughts and twists my insides. And none of this excuses my atrocious behavior.”
Before he could say anything else, she reached up and pressed two fingers to his firm lips, shushing him as, inside her, guilt and longing and something indefinable clashed. She desired nothing more than to burrow into him and lose herself in his innate strength and the exquisite feelings running roughshod through her.
But nothing good could come from doing so. Not for him, at any rate.
“Say no more. I am exactly who you discerned me to be when first we met—not to mention the woman who came here accusing you of malfeasance in her brother’s death. You do not owe me an apology. If anything…if anything…” It was no use.
Before she changed her mind, she turned and fumbled with the door lever, unable to grasp it thanks to her shaking hands.
Without a word, he reached past her, brushed her hands aside, and opened the door.
She crossed into the manse and fled down the stairs without a backward glance.
***
Sterling waited for her footsteps to recede, then allowed the door to close. He stared at it for a long moment, utterly befuddled. How had it happened that this slip of a woman, this uppity debutante, had shown up at his house and in a matter ofdays overturned not only his impression of her, but his common sense and self-control?
He no longer knew what he wanted—aside from her in his bed, which obviously could not happen.
Shaking his head, he went to retrieve the brandy he’d set at his feet when positioning her before the telescope. Glass in hand, he paced the rooftop, eyes drifting over the snow-capped grasslands surrounding the castle, though in truth he could see next to nothing.
