And this is poor timing and a shitty way to say it, but you should know that I’m divorcing your mother. Our marriagewas never built on the kind of love I wanted to have in my life, but staying with her means supporting her and the bullshit she believes in. I can’t do that anymore. Not when it hurts you. Not when it could hurt Amber worse than it already has.
You should also know I approve of Roger. He is … well, I would have hoped you’d pick a mortal partner, but considering you now have forever, I like him for you. If this Takashi I keep hearing about is even a quarter of the man he is, then I approve of him, too. I don’t care that you have two boyfriends at the same time. If a million-person polycule worked for you—well, I’d ask that you make sure people stay healthy. All I have ever wanted was for you to be happy and healthy.
I’m sorry that I caused you misery. A father shouldn’t do that.
I love you.
Dad
Dots of red landed on the page, and Zack had to hold the papers away before more of his tears fell on them. He didn’t have to worry about Seamus reading his thoughts; his mind was blank as comprehension sunk in.
His dad, who had faced more danger than anyone Zack knew, had called him the brave one. There was no condition on it. No expectation to be different than what he was. His dad even knew he was a vampire and wrote him a letter anyway. His dad still loved him, no matter what. He always had.
Roger and Thomas were definitely planning something big. The letter had all the hallmarks of “in case I die” without saying the words explicitly. For all the doubt that had plagued Zack, for all the tears he’d cried thinking his family had completely given up on him, his dad was trying to make it right. Amber was trying to do the right thing.
Suddenly, Zack wanted the one thing he wasn’t sure he’d ever have again. He wanted a hug from his dad.
You’re distraught. What’s wrong?Seamus asked.
Fuck. Zack pulled out his handkerchief and dried his face of tears. Quickly, he folded up the letter and slid it into his back pocket. His hand brushed against his dagger.
Walking downstairs and attacking Seamus in the middle of a party full of people who should protect him was a bad idea. Zack entertained it anyway just to settle himself.
I thought we were past this, Seamus said.
Me wanting to kill you?Zack asked.We were. Then you threatened my boyfriend like the abusive fucking monster that you are.
In time, you’ll see I am right about him.
Zack rolled his eyes and left the room. He hurried down the stairs to the second floor. The party’s atmosphere had shifted from an early-how-do-you-do to the eager energy of a blast in progress. Live music was coming from one room off to his right. Thankfully, nothing was going on in the ballroom. Zack was sick of dancing.
He was also sick to death of Seamus fucking up his life. With a few words and an act of violence, Seamus had also ruined Takashi’s life.
As Zack passed a room, an idea occurred. Seamus wasn’t the only one who could spew the wrong words to the right people. The crowd was composed of influential vampires. All he had to do was find the right one.
He bypassed the room where he felt Seamus’s presence and scanned the others for a group of people who had the right attitude. They needed to be gossiping but not so self-important that they’d be patronizing to a newbie vampire in their midst.
Ah, there. Candide had introduced him to a couple of the vampires in a dimly lit room decorated in dark browns andgolds. There were fewer mortals around, too, which was a bonus because the stimuli were threatening to cause another headache.
Dempsey was part of the crowd, and Zack strode over to him. With a raised brow, Dempsey motioned for Zack to sit beside him. A quick round of introductions and acknowledgments of acquittances were made. Then Dempsey said, “Did you get started early?”
Zack frowned.
Dempsey tapped his own collar.
“Oh. No.” Zack touched his collar and found a wet spot. His tears must have trailed onto his shirt. He snagged a glass of wine from a passing tray and swirled its contents, putting on his best brooding face and his grandest vampire persona. “Sometimes, having been murdered still bothers me. I was beaten to death, you see. Seamus offered to transform me, and I took it.”
The other vampires were practiced enough that no one shifted uncomfortably, but they did begin to still.
Ripping a page from Candide’s book, Zack put on a bright smile. “Some of you have to know how that is! Violence has brought many of us into this new life. I’m still adjusting, but I don’t regret taking the offer. Dying or living forever, I mean, who wouldn’t choose the forever, am I right?”
“That’s true,” Dempsey said slowly.
“I only wish I’d been smart enough to let my boyfriend Roger do it rather than gettingmurdered. Eh, but then I probably wouldn’t be as strong as I am.” Zack rushed from the couch he was sitting on, using every bit of speed that he had, and sat between two other vampires across the room. They jumped slightly.
The other chatter in the room died off. He had everyone’s attention.
“Was that fast? For a newbie?” Zack said. Shock was crossing more than a couple of faces. “I didn’t think I was until Takashi—sorry,Anton—made Katie. Ugh, it’s hard to keep track of all the pretenses you guys, well,wevamps, put on. As much as some of us are vampires. Did you know that that’s a fairly new word? I mean, how many of you are over two hundred years old? Only one? Well, then you know that when you were first a sireling, ‘vampire’ wasn’t a common word, huh? Anyway, what I guess I’m saying is ‘my father’ poured a lot of strength into me. He’s hoping to create a new generation of vampire, whatever the fuck that’s supposed to mean. Probably more supercharged fledglings like me. He’s got a whole fucking room full of profiles of people he wants to turn into his army so he can fight a war against dragons. Because somehow, they’re our worst enemies? I don’t know. Maybe he’s just jealous that they’re stronger than him.”
