“For the record, I was doing research into this dragon conspiracy when you called me down here,” Zack said. “Why would you want to go to war with them?”
“I have been subject to their abject tyranny for too long,” Seamus said.
Zack laughed before he could stop himself.
“I know you do not appreciate how I run the coven, but I have built the largest in North America and the second largest in the world. And yet, there are limits to what I am able to accomplish.”
“Fuck that. What about what you just did in there? You killed two of what should be precious to you. For what? A little fun? As some sick apology to your partner for beating the shit out of him?”
“You kill, Zackery. I watched you do so earlier tonight.”
“But I didn’t torture them first, and I can’t control my thirst yet.” Zack sank into his chair. “You can keep telling me how much it’s in a vampire’s nature, and I can continue hating you for it, or you can just stop rubbing my nose in how much you like to screw with people.”
“All right,” Seamus said, raising his hand in some sort of surrender. “I will do better to keep my feeding out of your sight.”
Somehow, that didn’t feel like a win. Zack shot Seamus a suspicious glare and tried to read his emotions, but they were a bland sort of “I’m enjoying this nice evening air” vibe.
“We need to discuss what you and Takashi just did,” Seamus said.
“I had the sex talk from my real father when I was eleven,” Zack replied.
“I assume he didn’t cover what can happen when vampires feed from each other,” Seamus said casually.
“I’m sure they do it all the time,” Zack said.You do not need to know about what happened with Takashi.
Seamus raised an eyebrow. “If I weren’t privy to your inner workings, I would have bought that as ignorance. You let Takashi feed and gain strength from you.”
“Did Anton tell you? He begged Takashi to make a foster sireling for him. Since you’ve been keeping Takashi on a terrible diet, he wasn’t well. I wasn’t going to let him suffer.”
“I was not suggesting that you should, only that you should apply a little more care in what you’re doing. Did he warn you about what might happen?”
Zack clamped his mouth shut.What we talked about isn’t your fucking business.
“I heard that. Listen, if he didn’t tell you that by offering yourself up like that, you might bind yourself to him, then you should be wary of him.”
Zack stared off into the darkness. Takashi had said something to basically that effect.I’ll know you intimately. As soon as the thought crossed his mind, he snarled softly at himself.Fuck. But how do you stop thinking?
“I don’t spend all my time listening to your thoughts,” Seamus said. “I have a coven to run, and now, thanks to Roger, finances to rebuild. Though your growth is important to me, I do have my own life.”
Wish I had mine, motherfucker.
“Honestly, Zackery, there’s no need for that type of language,” Seamus said patiently. “For what it’s worth, Takashi told you the truth in a romantic fashion. If you let him draw from you like that, you give him access to the deepest parts of yourself.He will have an easier time swaying your emotions, especially if you don’t watch your mind for intrusions. However, there is no permanent harm in sharing blood. With time and distance, any bond can be broken. But I would be an irresponsible sire if I didn’t point out the potential danger to you.”
“You’re telling me this because you care about me,” Zack drawled.
“You should believe that I do.” Seamus put his hand on Zack’s shoulder. The wall Zack had instinctually constructed turned transparent—he was more aware of its absence than its creation—and he glimpsed at what Seamus was transmitting to him. There was a caring and fondness.
The closest Zack could relate it to was when he used to help his sister learn to read. Amber had always pouted and cried until Zack figured out she liked really spooky fairy tales, and then they’d spent hours upon hours together reading every edition they could get their hands on. It was a kind of love.
Seamus wasn’t allowed to feel that for him. He was a monster. And him caring about Zack would only make Zack a monster. He was sure of it.
But fighting every second of every night with him was exhausting. Zack grabbed the wineglass and took a huge gulp. It tasted like mud and blood and the bite of a winter storm up his nose. He choked on it and spat half of it back into the glass.
“We’ll have to work on your appreciation for fine things,” Seamus said smugly.
Zack set the wineglass down.
“Obstinate about everything still?” Seamus asked.
