Almost immediately, she lifted her fingers to her mouth and began subconsciously fidgeting with her lips, her eyes flicking so quickly across the page that I got dizzy watching. When I moved to stand, she released the book and grabbed my sweater, my nose scrunching at the way she stretched the material. She really had no eye for style or quality or even care of clothing.
“Altair, tell me what you’re planning. Please. I can tell you’re trying here, but it’s hard to…” Her words faded, lips pursing and eyes pinching closed so tightly her dark lashes seemed to be sucked in. I waited with bated breath, begging to know what she was going to say. Mercifully, she continued. “It’s hard to trust you when you lie to me. Maybe I was wrong thinking I couldn’t use your help. You’re…smart.And you know a lot about the world that I honestly don’t. What I’m trying to say is that I could use an ally in this. If you’re not trying to hurt me or pawn me or kill me, then just tell me what it is you want.”
Fuck, I was getting hard looking at her.
You, Tershetta. I want you. Just a taste. A single night. Day. Stars, I could spend a week on you and not grow tired.
Gulping the saliva that pooled in my mouth at the sight of her sitting there, lips parted and eyes looking up at me, I decided the time had come. Maybe that was for the best. Maitoza could take Tershetta, and I wouldn’t have to see her every day anymore, wishing I could have her while knowing I couldn’t.
“Let me make some food—”
“Which you’re surprisingly decent at for a man who probably never even spread jam on bread before.”
“Rude, but thanks. Let me make some food, and then we can talk. Just…read.”
“You promise to tell me?” She still hadn’t released my shirt, and I noticed her grip was loosening. I couldn’t stop myself, I took a step forward, Tershetta’s face now just in front of my cock, which seemed to twitch in anticipation. With little to lose now that I knew she’d be gone by nightfall, I gripped her jaw, tilting her head further back. My thumb slid across her skin, and I watched in awe as her soft brown cheeks pinkened.
“I promise, Little Void.”
“I hate that you call me that.” She whispered it, not moving from my grip or taking her eyes off mine. She could have, I held her so loosely. But shedidn’t.
“I don’t mean it the same way I did before. You’re not nothing, Tershetta. You’re the absence of the hatred the world offers.” Too cowardly to see or hear her reaction to my words, I let her go and walked around the wooden table, quickly making my way to the kitchen. I didn’t look back as I gathered everything. Scared. I was fucking scared.
After preparing the mushrooms, onions, spinach, and cheese the way Celeste had begrudgingly showed me, I took a chance at glancing over my shoulder.
Tershetta, ever the determined and focused study, was on the sofa, her legs crossed as she read. Her curls had been tamed the last two days after she had meticulously wrapped them around her fingers. I had watched her for awhile, seeing how each time she wrapped a damp curl around a digit, it would twirl in silky rings. They fell down into her face now, blocking my view of her slightly. Light from the window above my bed shone onto her, finding the gaps in her hair and decorating her face in an orange glow.
Whipping my head back around, I began cracking the eggs, trying to rid my mind of the images of her. I’d never been like this. It wasoverwhelming. Terrifying. Jarring. Absolutely repulsive.
Yes, telling her about the rebellion was best. This was all going too far. I was starting to think that simply fucking her once couldn’t possibly satiate the strange hunger that was building inside of me. If she left now, at least I’d stop before I started. Before I knew what I was missing out on.
Finishing up the omelets, I quickly plated them and walked straight to the dining table, setting them across from one another. Tershetta was so engrossed in the book that she didn’t seem to notice I had finished, so I took the time to open the icebox and pour lemonade I’d gotten from Desi.
By the time I’d walked the cups over to the table and set them down, Tershetta still hadn’t looked up. So, instead of disrupting her and facing her fury, I decided to pull out one of the notes I’d found on my bed.
The parchment was meticulously folded, as if the person had wanted it to look pristine. Quinn, probably. Unfolding it, I prepared for the pain.
Az,
You know, this whole writing you letters you don’t respond to game is getting old. I mean really, are you incapable of just saying you’re alive?
Scratch that, it’s probably best you don’t. I wouldn’t tell you this if I didn’t have to, because I know you like to assume you’re somehow responsible for our safety, but it’s kind of important. Pri’s father nearly drowned her in her own tub the other day. It had something to do with finding you for yourmother. My mother asked me too, but she wasn’t nearly as persistent. Something’s going on, Az.
That brings me to my next point: I think Talon framed you. I can’t prove it, but the way he’s been so skittish and unwilling to talk about it has me on edge. If I try to use alghazi on him, he loses it. Says I have no right to intrude on his mind. And get this, Tershetta ismissing. There are signs everywhere, and the colonels are all losing their fucking minds trying to find her. Again, I can’t prove it, but I think Talon might have done something to her. Or, maybe she found you. I told you she was looking for you, right? Maybe she tried to kill you and you’re both dead on some random planet. Who knows? Not me, because you’re NOT RESPONDING.
Quinn
Okay, so Quinn was pissed off. That made sense. And there was something nagging at me about Priya. Mother had only mentioned it when talking about a new heir. Could she be wanting to welcome me home? Would they let me come back in their desperation?
While I’d never admitted it out loud, I knew I had already made the decision. I wouldn’t go back. Not unless it was to kill Father. From there…
My eyes wandered back to Tershetta, watching as she twirled one of her curls, causing it to frizz.
I didn’t know what I’d do from there. Not anymore.
Since Tershetta wasn’t paying attention, I summoned my journal, keeping my eyes on her in case she caught sight of the shadows. I didn’t need her finding it, because stars knew she was nosy enough to read it.
Luckily, she was completely absorbed in whatever she was reading from the book on magic, and I had my journal open without a hitch. I flipped halfway through it, running my fingers along the jagged edge of the page I’d ripped out, the letter I’d written to Celeste stating her sister was awake and well left unanswered.
