That I would never be frightened again.
That I would always know the right thing before the wrong one left my mouth.
Beautiful promises with no useful relationship to reality.
“I don’t want to promise something I haven’t learned how to do,” I said.
Ellie looked away.
For a second, I thought honesty had been the wrong choice.
Then she nodded.
“That is at least honest.”
“It isn’t reassuring.”
“No.”
“I could say something more reassuring.”
“Please don’t.”
I leaned back.
The call no longer felt like an opening.
It felt like standing beside a door neither of us had agreed to touch.
Ellie’s fingers moved over the bracelet.
“Has this happened before?”
I knew what she meant.
“Yes.”
“With another woman?”
“Yes.”
“What was her name?”
“Claire.”
Ellie waited.
“Were you together long?”
“Almost three years.”
Her expression shifted.
Not jealousy.
Calculation.
“You hid her too.”
