Just like you are here to remind me I have already been chosen, I will be here to remind you that you have already been redeemed. I don’t love you in spite of your past; I love you because of it. I know it’s because your heart is capable of so much feeling, so much love, that it couldn’t withstand the pain and grief you faced so early in life without seeking relief. You found a way to survive, and for that, I am endlessly grateful. Because it led you to me—our fates that so easily intertwined, our hearts that so easily understood one another from the start. I’ve never met anyone like you. Through you, I saw the woman I could be on the other sideof my shame and fear. You freed me, and that is why I trust you with my mind, my body, my soul. I know you will take care of me the same way you take care of everyone else in your life, with thoughtfulness and gentleness you have never once sought recognition for.
You’re my favorite person. And I can’t imagine a life without you or a world in which I am not yours.
Love,
Nova
I stared at the letter for another thirty seconds, eyes blurry, stunned.
“Please say something,” Nova suddenly said, abusing her bottom lip.
Instead, I grabbed her face and kissed her, exploring her mouth as if I could find the answer to how someone so perfect existed, and how that someone wasmine.
But she’d explained exactly how in her letter, and those beautiful words had humbled me, torn my heart into a million pieces, and then rebuilt it again.
When I pulled back, we were breathless. Nova stared deep into my soul, the soul I never thought I could show to anyone in its totality. She saw all of it, even the darkest parts, and she loved it all.
“I don’t have words,” I said softly. “Not like you do. Fuck, Nova, thank you. That’s all I can say. Thank you for being exactly who you are. Thank you for your trust, especially after everything that’s happened. You’remyfavorite person. I think I knew you would be from the moment we first met, somewhere deep inside. My soul recognized yours, and I’ve been falling ever since.”
“You lied,” she whispered, placing a hand on my chest. “Youdohave words. And I love all of them.”
I smiled. “I think it’s time for another round of torture.”
Her smile fell.
“It’s your turn to open gifts.”
Nova tried not to cringe. I knew how uncomfortable me spoiling her made her, but she’d get used to it.
“Yes, I know, your terrible boyfriend wants to buy you things and watch you blush. You have averyhard life.” I lifted the collar. “And if it makes you feel any better, just remember, you don’t have a choice.”
Her smile was back the moment the leather strap closed around her throat.
56
NOVA
Wes and I stepped into Third House, and the entire coffee shop burst into cheers.
My cheeks reddened as I scanned the crowd. Hudson, Delilah, and my other friends stood next to Ruby and the baristas. Wes’s sponsor, Will, smiled at us, lifting his sparkling drink as he stood with a couple of Wes’s other AA friends. We were in a room of people who loved us, who lovedme.
“Congratulations!” Ruby said, coming to give Wes and me hugs.
The space was warm and dimly lit, everyone gathered to celebrate my book release. It went live three days ago.
We had all chipped in to slowly rebuild all that Roman had destroyed in Ruby’s shop. The original art and ceramics couldn’t be replaced, but new art was created by several people in the community to fill in the gaps.
I hated that so many people had been caught in the crossfire of Roman’s one-sided feud. I knew Wes still struggled with his own guilt about that. I gave his hand a squeeze.
“I read the early reviews,” Ruby continued. “They were stellar.”
“Except for one very stupid person who can’t fucking type,” Hudson said, crossing his arms.
I smiled. “Now that my book baby has been released into the world, I have to wash my hands of it. No more obsessive review-scrolling for me.”
Wes kissed the side of my head. “Well, I concur with Hudson. You can’t write a negative review if you can’t even write a sentence.”
“I’ll beat their ass,” Delilah said.
