“You want to run away?You would trade your toys, bed, and playroom to be a street rat?The world would eat you alive, princess.”
I’d always told myself I wouldn’t let the world do that…eat me alive. I would bite back. I’d rather be a scrappy street rat than a petrified princess. But I couldn’t deny that I was naturally soft. The sharpest part of me was my tongue. If I was in actual danger, I didn’t know what I would do. How I would handle it.IfI could handle it.
Icy adrenaline shot through my veins when a noise came from the front door. A light thud. Then, the clink of the knob moving. I grabbed the axe beside my bed, the biggest “weapon” Theo had left me. I figured it had more reach than a knife.
Fuck. I don’t want this. I just want to exist.
My eyes watered, but cleared with a steadying breath. I peeled myself from the mattress, wincing when my feetsqueaked the floorboards. I could hear noises still, but they didn’t seem to be drawing nearer. Maybe I could surprise them.
I tightened my grip on the handle and shuffled my feet to the edge of the partition wall.
You can do this. You aren’t a princess. You aren’t a goddess. You’re a fed-up woman with an axe who wants some goddamn peace. You don’t need your dad. You don’t need Theo. All you need is for people to stay off your fucking property.
Drawing in a steadying breath, I burst around the edge of the wall—axe raised and ready to meet skull.
“Mreow.” Nurghle had one furry arm stuck under the door swatting around. He withdrew it and stood on his hind legs to paw at the door handle, jiggling the knob.
The axe thudded anticlimactically to the floor. He wanted to go out.Of course. We’d been cooped up for days after a long, claustrophobic winter.
“Sorry, bud,” I sighed, scooping him up into my arms. “I think the cabin fever is getting to me.”
My blood was still pumping, but I was feeling just a little more steeled from my peptalk. Not quite “I want tofight the bad guys” brave, but at least brave enough to consider looking for Cassius’s corpse. If he hadn’t showed up yet, he was probably dead. Seeing his rotting flesh might make me feel better. Like when I’d finally found that dead rat behind my fridge. Disgusting, but at least I could get rid of the smell that’d haunted me all week. Gross relief. That’s what I needed.
“Stay here.” I set Nurghle on the mattress. “Mommy is going to go look for a dead body.”
It was surprisingly nice out. A little cloudy, but there were also peaks of purple and green sky painting the landscape intrippy, otherworldly light. The delicate clover of my field pressed down underneath my feet as I swung my weapon of choice and walked towards the gin-and-sage-green wheat border of my field.
I felt my anxiety rise as my most recent memory of being between these trees surfaced. Running. Fear. A man with a gun. I’d reclaim the joy of my forest with enough practice. He was dead. That’s what I told myself as I passed the grove Theo and I had shared a night in.
Yay… halfway to Ida’s cabin.Only a little further and I’d be where I’d had my initial run-in with Cassius.
The sight of a tall bundle of above-ground roots gave me pause. They looked familiar. I slowed and watched the ground for foot marks, realizing—chances are—they’d washed away by now.
I soon recognized the root I’d jumped when fleeing. My chest clenched. I’d find Cassius’s decay soon and everything would be okay.It had to be.
I could smell death before I could see it, but there was also a trace of something darkly pleasant. Like noxious lavender. Familiar to me in a way I couldn’t put into words.
A heap of blackness as tall as my knees stood before me.Nota decaying man. The pungent floral scent tainted the summer breeze, unlocking the memory of Theo carrying me away from the wild animal he saved me from.By killing it.
Cassius is still alive.
I didn’t have any tears left to cry, but that didn’t stop my face from twisting into a deep, mournful, sob of rage as I kicked at the mass of death. The toe of my boot sunk into the fleshyrot, causing me to panic and stumble to free myself. The struggle only made me angrier.
It’s a fucking demon bear-thing! How the fuck did it lose that fight?!
The answer was less than subtle. Bullets and their casings sparkled amongst the pile of black.
“I don’t think it’s much farther.” The words were distant, muffled, but stood out like a gunshot among the natural noises of Cyciciah.
No. No. No. No!Not again.
Adrenaline pumping in my veins, I turned and ran. I hadn’t seen them. They hadn’t seen me.Probably. I could try to disappear and hope they missed my field. After all, it was a big mountain. Surely that was possible.
I hiked my dress up and sprinted back, taking as few breaks to catch my breath as possible. Nurghle was locked up in the house alone. I couldn't go missing now. I’d heard of mothers lifting cars off babies, I could run up a mountain to save my little guy.
Finally breaking through the front door, I bent over to catch my breath. Nurghle was on my ankles immediately, greeting me.
Thank fuck. I made it.
