I do everything… the toys, the videos, my hands, all of it… I come, over and over and over, andnone of it even scratches the surface,because my actual problem has a name, a whole-ass huge body, tusks, and horns, pretty dark eyes, a taste to die for, and a magnificently enormous dick I’ve felt through our clothes, hands big enough to break me, heat so strong he feels like a fucking furnace, a scent that makes my mouth fucking water, and that motherfucker is not here. I know what the real thing is now. That’s what ruined me. I know what his mouth tastes like, that impossible honey-dark-chocolate that whites out my whole brain. I know what his fingers feel like working into me knuckle by knuckle, what his voice does to me when he saysgood girl,what his chest sounds like when he purrs. I had the real thing, even just the bit of it he gave, but now I’m lying here trying to fill an orc-shaped hole in my body with silicone and a laptop, and it’s like trying to put out a fire with a thimble.
I slowly push The Warchief inside me, inch by inch, folds spreading, inner muscles spasming, slick coating it, dripping around it, and I sob, because it’s not enough… This shit is nowhere near enough, it’s nothim.When I licked it, it didn’t taste like my Sven. It doesn’t growl, doesn’t call me any filthy petnames, doesn’t hold me after I come. It’s just a thing. A sad copy. A sad substitute for the one thing I can’t have.
And my heat keeps building. It comes in waves, each one worse than the previous, my body’s crying out formyalpha, that’s who Sven Greymark is, I’m not even pretending anymore… and between the waves I lie there wrecked, sweating, and half-insane, thinking about him. I could call him. I could call him and not even say the real thing. I could just saycome over,and he would. I know he would; he’d be here in minutes…
But then he’dsmellit. The second he’d walk in. He’d know. There would be no hiding it, no more lies, he’d walk into my place, scent me, and know I what called him for,and I can’t… I can’t do that, I can’t be the pathetic little omega who falls apart after date three and summons her guy like fucking room service…
Another wave hits me so hard I cry out, curling on the bed, slick gushing from my poor abused cunt, clenching on nothing,empty, empty, so damn empty!I reach for the green toy again. I’m crying, actually crying, frustrated, aching, so damn alone, and I thinkfine, fine, I’ll callhim.I can’t dothis.I’ll call him and die ofembarrassment,but at least I’ll…
And that’s when someone pounds on my door.
I freeze.
The pounding comes again… it’s not just a knock, it’s a fist, hard. So hard it makes the door shake in its frame. My first insane thought is that I conjured him, that I wanted him so bad he appeared, and then his scent hits me. It comes under the wood. Cedar, smoke, and that dark, warm thing,here,thick and real and pouring into my apartment. My body lunges toward it so hard I have to grab the headboard. I’m clenching, slick dripping down my thighs, every cell in me turning toward that door, and I scream.
But shit, he thinks I’m sick. If he’s out there, he’s going to…
“Esme.” Sven’s voice comes through the wood panel. Low and rough. “Esme. It’s me. I came to take care of you, baby…” A pause, then his voice changes completely. It drops, turning stunned and feral all at once. Because he’s close enough now, because heknows.“…Esme.”
I’m pressed against the headboard in soaked sheets, my pussy stuffed to the brim with a gigantic toy, the alpha I’ve been losing my mind over is on the other side, and he’s stopped thinking I’m sick. He knows exactly what’s happening to me.
“Open the door, little one,” he fucking growls.
Fourteen
Sven
She’s not sick. The worry I came here with instantly evaporates, and something else altogether takes its place.
I broke every speed limit, a bag of soup and ginger ale on my passenger seat… and… Heat. My mate is in fucking heat. The scent of her pours under the door so thick I have to brace a hand on the frame, vanilla, slick, and fuckingneed.The smell of my omega’s body, open, aching, and under it, woven all the way through, ME! MY FUCKING SCENT! Weeks of me soaked into her, and now her heat’s pulled it up to the surface and she smells like she’s already mine. All fucking mine.
She’s in heat. She’s been in heat alone. Riding it out by herself because she’s too proud or too scared to call me.
The grocery bag hits the floor, and I forget it even exists.
“Esme.” I press my forehead to the door. My whole body’s shaking. “Please, love.Open the door.”
The lock turns, the door opens, and there she is. The vision of my girl nearly brings me to my knees. She looks wrecked, wearing a thin tank top that’s soaked through with sweat, hertiny sleep shorts dark at the crotch, hair wild, skin damp, her pretty eyes blown black and feverishly bright. She’s got one hand clutching the doorframe like it’s the only thing holding her up, her scent rolls over me in full force with nothing in the way. No doors, barely any space between us. And I nearly fucking black out.
“You’re not sick,” I hear myself growl.
“No,” her chin comes up. Even now, even like this, she’s strong. Fuck, my girl. “I’m not sick.”
“You’ve been like this all day?” It comes out low and ragged. “Alone. You sent me a fuckingemailwhen you’ve been inheat,by yourself, and you didn’t…” My voice breaks. “Why didn’t you call?”
“Because I’ve only known you for weeks!” She yells back. “I wasn’t gonna call you and say… I have some dignity, Sven.”
“Esme.”
“…andyoukeepstopping,youkeep getting me out of my mind and then stopping, I don’t know if you even…”
“Esme.” I step in close, into the wall of her scent, and take her face in my hands. She goes quiet, breathing hard. “I have wanted you since the second you walked into my library. Baby, every time I stopped, it wasn’t because I didn’t want you. It was because I wanted you so much that…” I shake my head. “I wanted to do it right. I wanted youready.”
Her breath shudders.
My eyes never leave hers.
“You’re mine,” I growl, and it’s the most certain thing I’ve ever said in my whole damn life. “You’ve been mine from day one. I’ve just been waiting for the right time.”
