Gunnar looks from the potion to me, and suddenly, I want him to throw the potion on the ground and say he doesn’t need it. He’s choosing me. He’s—
Throwing back his head, Gunnar downs the potion in one gulp. Grimacing, he tosses the jar onto the ground where it shatters somewhere behind him. He clutches his stomach with a low groan.
Oh goddess. Did we poison him?
“Are you well?” Wulfric asks, bending close to Gunnar’s ear.
Gunnar takes a few breaths in and out.
“Gunnar? Talk to us,” Dad says, worrying his thumbnail with his teeth. Mum rubs his shoulders, giving me a worried look.
“I feel…” Gunnar hesitates and slowly stands up straight. He touches a hand to his chest and closes his eyes. “I don’t know. Quiet. In my head. For the first time in years.”
A smile curls Wulfric’s lips. “I felt the same after I mated with Kieran. Everything inside me went quiet. I felt the way a deer must feel, grazing in a meadow without fear of predators.”
Gunnar nods, blinking fast. “I think… I think it’s gone. All the anger, the despair. It’s just… gone.”
Anders swings an arm around his shoulders and tugs, knocking their heads together lightly. “Feels good, doesn’t it? Like you can breathe and think clearly.”
“May I check?” Kendrick asks.
Kieran folds his arms. “Depends. How’re you checking him exactly?”
“A simple spell. He won’t even feel it.”
Gunnar nods, ignoring the wary looks from his pack.
“Don’t try anything, witch,” Helga warns.
Kendrick stops in front of Gunnar and lays a hand on his chest. She closes her eyes. Gunnar tenses and a glow spreads through his body from head to toe. He remains calm and still until the glow fades, then quickly steps out of reach.
Kendrick opens her eyes and smiles. “Well done! The potion really has worked. This is an incredible breakthrough!” She spins around toward Nan. “Can you make more?”
“Only if your people are paying for it. The botanist charges a small fortune for his lunar flowers!” Nan says.
“That won’t be a problem. Give us his contact information.”
While she and Nan talk, I turn back to Gunnar and find him celebrating with his brothers, their mates, and his aunt. I attempt a smile even as my vision blurs. This is good. It is. It’s not what I wanted, but still. I’m happy for him. He deserves to get everything he wants.
I was always going to have to let him go.
I thought I knew that.
Gunnar’s eyes find mine, and the smile falls from his face. “Lo?” He steps away from his family.
I fake a cough and take an interest in my shoes. “I can’t believe it worked.”
“Arlo.”
I’ve got to leave now. Before I start bawling like a child. “I’ll… I’ll be seeing you, Gunnar. This was…” It was everything, and now it’s over, and fuck, I feel like my chest is caving in.
Before I can turn away, Gunnar grabs my arm. A muscle in his jaw bunches. “Come with me.” He motions off to the side toward the trees. Right. He doesn’t want to break my heart in front of his family. Again.
When his back is turned, I thumb away the wetness in my eyes and follow him. Once we’re within the trees, he stops and turns to me. The look on his face cuts me to the quick. He looks as devastated as I feel.
“I’m so sorry, Lo.” His voice cracks and he clears his throat, blinking hard.
All the anger I’ve been clinging to crumbles when I see how close he is to falling apart.
