Greer reaches over to hold my free hand.
“It’s a pain I don’t want to experience again, and it’s a pain I’d never wish on someone. Dating means taking that chance for both parties, and as for tonight, I wanted to give my mom some sort of happiness in this area of my life. Even if it’s not going to last.”
Considering Greer’s mindset is the total opposite of mine, I hold my breath, waiting for the moment when she pulls her hand from mine.
When she finally shuts me out and ends this thing between us.
But she doesn’t move her hand, and I slowly turn to catch her watching me. Greer and I have spent a lot of time together this summer, and at this point, I can usually read her mind, but right now, I don’t even know where to begin.
I can hear the faint music playing from my car stereo as I wait for her to say something. I know I stumbled through my words at first. Maybe when they finally came out, they were too much for her.
She blinks, and a tear drops from her eye.
“Don’t do that,” I say. “Please don’t cry for me.”
She shakes her head and swipes the tear away. “I’m not. It’s just… I think you’re one of the best dads, brothers, sons, friends I’ve ever met, and to know that you think you…” Her words trail off as she shakes her head. “Now I know why you keep pushing me away when we kiss.”
“I promise I’m not trying to hurt you.”
“Can I ask you something?” she asks as if she didn’t hear my last statement.
“Of course.”
“When do you think about yourself?”
“What?”
She twists in her seat, pulling one leg up to tuck the ankle under her other knee. She’s ready to have a good talk, and we still have at least an hour to go. I should have known anything I said wouldn’t scare her.
This isGreer.
There is no one like her.
“I mean, genuinely, when was the last time you didn’t think of others, and you did what you wanted?”
I rub my chin and grin. “The night we had phone sex.”
“Mm-hmm, that doesn’t count.”
“Really? Because I’m pretty sure I did what I wanted that night, consequences be damned.”
The conversation we’re having now should have been one we had before that night, but I can’t go back now, and I sure as hell don’t regret that night either.
“Come on, Simon, be serious.”
I sigh. “I don’t know. My life has been pretty crazy lately.”
“Okay, well, if you could do one thing right now, if you could drive this car anywhere, where would you choose?”
“I really don’t know.”
“Simon.”
“How about, I’ll think about it and let you know when we get home?”
She crosses her arms and pretends to pout, but after only a few seconds, she says, “You better think of something.”
The conversation steers away from anything serious to the way Grey yelled bullshit and how Beck didn’t win a single hand tonight. I learn that Greer once found a dog on the side of the road, hid it in her room, feeding him table scraps until she felt so bad that she finally called the number on his collar so he could go back to his family.
