We met before my twenty-first birthday, fell in love quickly, and she got pregnant all within about six months. I proposed a year or so after Grey was born, and then a week before Grey’s second birthday, she left for the movies with friends. Next thing I knew, an officer was at our door to tell me about the car accident.
I hate that Grey has had to grow up without his mom. I hate that she never got to see him ride his first bike or hug him the first time he broke his arm. I hate that she never got her big day with the dress that’s still packed away because what if Grey meets someone and she… fuck.
I take a breath and sit on the bed.
This right here, this feeling of knowing I had something amazing and lost it is why I’ve never seriously dated since Blair. Have I come to terms and accepted life without her? Yes. Am I thankful for every moment we had together? Yes. But loving someone and losing them is a feeling I never want to experience again.
“Dad!” Grey walks into my room.
“Hey, buddy. Knock first, remember?”
He groans and closes the door.
“Are you almost ready?” he yells from the other side instead of knocking.
I shake my head and grab some shorts and a shirt.
“Yep.”
Then I slip on some sandals, brush my teeth, comb my hair, and open my door to find him waiting.
He looks at his watch.
“You’re cutting it close,” he says and leads me down the straight to the kitchen.
“We’re going to make it just fine.”
“Football starts at noon, and soccer is at three. I need to eat a proper amount of protein before then, Dad.”
“Got it.”
Hence why he’s rushing me out the door. I promised him a power salad from one of the local juice shops downtown before practice today.
“No more pizza. We’ve had it three times this week.”
“Okay,Dad,” I tease and roll my eyes behind him. “Go get your things.”
“They’re already in the truck.”
“Go brush your teeth then.”
“Done.” He smiles.
I glance around the clean kitchen, then I poke my head into the living room. There are actually vacuum lines in the carpet.
Damn. Okay. He can keep his half hour-long hot showers.
He grabs a water bottle from the cabinet and starts to fill it up at the fridge.
This single dad thing is tough shit sometimes, but I got lucky. Grey is a great kid.
“Stop staring at me,” he whines, and then grabs his backpack before walking out the door to the garage.
I can’t help but laugh.
Seriously, who is the parent here?
I hop into the truck, and as soon as we’re both buckled in, I head downtown. It’s a quick drive. The juice shop is four doors down from The Space, a community workspace location that Tobias and I just recently opened up.
